Dear Married Guy:
- Thread starter vraiblonde
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acommondisaster
Active Member
Why are you hunting married guys sitting alone in bars? 
Why are you hunting married guys sitting alone in bars?
She did notice the "rings".
somdfunguy
not impressed
Baby and wife were asleep and I can't see my baseball team from my TV.
Railroad
Routinely Derailed
I used to hang out in bars alone. I was often on business trips by myself and sometimes was stuck in a remote location over the weekend. Nowadays, if I were a drinker, whether traveling or not, and assuming I have the cash to spare, I'd be there alone (albeit sans wedding ring) because I'm separated pursuant to divorce, and not in a relationship with anyone. But I don't watch TV anymore (turned in my cable boxes weeks ago), so the attraction would be people-watching, particularly members of the opposite sex. People-watching and listening to the many conversations in progress can be quite entertaining and sometimes educational - works well in ANY public place, not just bars.
Also, some guys are pretty selective with regard to approaching and talking to (or trying to pick up) a female. Could be worth the time spent watching and waiting, but usually not. Hence, I wouldn't do bars much, either as a drinker or a non-drinker. Finding a potential partner is even worse online, though, I imagine (though I've never tried it).
So what are the alternatives? I've no clue and really don't care that much at the moment, but I suppose there are alternative places to fritter away time while hoping to meet "someone."
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Makes sense to me. People are a hoot, and many, many times in public places conversations are for everybody around them, by the speakers choice, because of loudness and rudeness, especially concerning cell phones.
Bars, sports pubs, restaurants, and checkout lines are great places for people within earshot to learn everything they didn't want or need to know about the speaker/s.
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I think it's interesting that it's been repeatedly assumed these guys were on the prowl, although I made it clear in my initial post that they didn't appear to be.
Radiant1
Soul Probe
It seemed to me the assumption was that you were on the prowl.
That's interesting, too. Can't be that I just like hanging out with friends, having a drink and dancing to a band - must be that I'm on the hunt for butt.
That says a lot about the assumers, I think.
acommondisaster
Active Member
I forgot about this thread.....So since you've seen a few different guys doing this, there are probably just as many explanations: maybe he's just lost his wife and hasn't been able to bring himself to take his ring off yet. Maybe he's waiting to see if his wife is really stepping out on him and this is where he thinks she goes. Maybe he's just had some bad news and needed to get away from his everyday demands and think. Maybe his wife doesn't let him drink at home.
My husband used to go up to Deep Creek Lake on "retreats" with guys from work - they'd rent a house and "team build". My husband said one of the guys was notorious for intentionally dropping his wedding ring on the floor in a bar and getting women to help him find it. My husband said he was amazed how many women were eager to help look for it (and then got very friencly with the guy).
My husband used to go up to Deep Creek Lake on "retreats" with guys from work - they'd rent a house and "team build". My husband said one of the guys was notorious for intentionally dropping his wedding ring on the floor in a bar and getting women to help him find it. My husband said he was amazed how many women were eager to help look for it (and then got very friencly with the guy).
Larry Gude
Strung Out
Ok. Maybe "offended" was the wrong word. Perhaps "perturbed" or maybe even "curious" would have been better words to attempt to describe your posts on this topic.
You seem, uh, angry that, apparently, someone had the gall to talk to you while you were dancing and conversing with others, or something like that.
Good enough, or still condemning married (by a ring, I suspect) peeps that sit at a bar by themselves and attempt to strike up a conversation with an attractive member of the opposite sex?
Or was this poor guy's name Larry, by happenstance?
Hey, folks. I'd like to introduce you all to Vrai. Vrai, everyone. Everyone, Vrai.
Vrai is an engaging sort. She likes people. A lot. She likes them so much that she has, and maintains, a web site whereby people say all sorts of things that she then can, depending on her interests of the day, engage them in conversation, observe and all around enjoy what the people do.
Further, if you are doing something, pretty much anything in the real world that catches her interest, she'll become curious about that, too. She might ask you "Why'd they do that?' She might ask them, 'why'd you do that?'.
Think of her as a sort of anthropologist of humanity. A sociologist. An investigator, analyst, a dissector of human behavior. She means no harm and won't bite so, don't be alarmed or concerned if you suddenly feel her gaze pausing upon you. Take it as a compliment; you just did something worthy of conversation.
Folks, this is what she does. And does. And does and does some more.
PS: If it really puts you off, don't move. Don't do anything. Don't say anything. Nothing to attract attention whatsoever.
Then, after awhile, she'll go 'Huh. Whaddya suppose that person over there doing absolutely nothing is...doing?"
Of course, if you'd been paying attention, observing, pondering, you'd know that already...
Vrai is an engaging sort. She likes people. A lot. She likes them so much that she has, and maintains, a web site whereby people say all sorts of things that she then can, depending on her interests of the day, engage them in conversation, observe and all around enjoy what the people do.
Further, if you are doing something, pretty much anything in the real world that catches her interest, she'll become curious about that, too. She might ask you "Why'd they do that?' She might ask them, 'why'd you do that?'.
Think of her as a sort of anthropologist of humanity. A sociologist. An investigator, analyst, a dissector of human behavior. She means no harm and won't bite so, don't be alarmed or concerned if you suddenly feel her gaze pausing upon you. Take it as a compliment; you just did something worthy of conversation.
Folks, this is what she does. And does. And does and does some more.
PS: If it really puts you off, don't move. Don't do anything. Don't say anything. Nothing to attract attention whatsoever.
Then, after awhile, she'll go 'Huh. Whaddya suppose that person over there doing absolutely nothing is...doing?"
Of course, if you'd been paying attention, observing, pondering, you'd know that already...
...and if you did know all of this already - is why you love her, as well.
You'd think the forum people would know that about me by now and not read into everything I post.
And that's the key, isn't it? People don't even pay attention to themselves, let alone anyone else.
Vrai: That's interesting, now why do you say that?
Other person: Uhhhh.......
Hank
my war
You come up with the best band names!
PS: If it really puts you off, don't move. Don't do anything. Don't say anything. Nothing to attract attention whatsoever.
:velocirapter:
You'd think the forum people would know that about me by now and not read into everything I post.
It has been a huge sociology experiment ... funded by the NSA