Honest Opinion and/or Insight

[LadyWolf]

So he just called me. Im at work so the conversation was unfortunately brief (hes convinced that me talking on my work phone will get me fired so he never talks long until I can call him from my cell phone once I get off work).

I asked him how his weekend was. He said "Good, until yesterday." Apperently Saturday they all had plans to go out drinking, so he didnt take his pain meds and left them in his hotel room. Well they all went out to dinner, etc. and he decided it be best for him to actually drive home because a lot of the guys got way too drunk wayyy too fast. So he ended up not drinking and driving everyone back to the hotel. He said it was really late but his back wasnt really bothering him (for once) so he didnt take any of his meds except his mild muscle relaxer just to ensure he stayed asleep.

So yesterday rolled around, they all checked out, said their goodbyes, and headed home. He said his stomach was upset the entire morning so he put off taking his more powerful meds. Once he got halfway home, however, he said his back was really bothering him so he tried to take something for it. Well he puked that something right back up, and continued to puke until about 3 pm when he realized that not only did he probably have food poisioning from dinner the night before, but he was also starting to go through mild detox. So he went to the hospital. Where he stayed for about 6 hours (until around 11:00pm or so) until he was keeping fluids and his meds down. Which explains the short midnight text saying "Yea Ill call you tomorrow."

Now, would I have liked to have heard from him once he got home? Yes. However, being in the hospital for 6 hours is a good enough for me for him to not call. Especially since there is no cell reception at Calvert Memorial. That and considering he was basically going through detox, Im sure the furthest thing from his mind was calling me. Plus when he isnt feeling well, he dosnt want anyone around him. All the more reason for him to not call me because he knows me - I would have driven straight to the hospital. Im not making excuses for him (like I said I would have liked to have heard from him once he got home, etc), but puking and being hooked to IVs in the hospital w/o cell signal is a pretty good excuse for not calling. But I digress...

So after he explained all this he said "Well Im gonna let you get back to work. I just wanted to call and say Hi. Why dont you give me a call or stop by on your way home? Ill be here until 9:00 but then I have to leave for work." I said that I'd probably stop by, he said "Ok sounds good. I hope you have a good day, babe. Ill see you later. I love you. Bye."

That part right there makes me think maybe I was overreacting juuusssttt a lil bit this weekend. Now like I said, Im not making excused for him. Im defintiely going to ask why in the H3LL he didnt call me all weekend and probably give him a little shyt about it. Maybe not today or tomorrow, but eventually Ill say something about it (a female never forgets). Honestly, when it comes down to it, Im just glad hes OK and him saying that "I love you" part seems like a good sign. Im not doing the happy dance yet - especially since Im a little irked about him not calling all weekend - but I'm definitely not in a I-Want-To-Crawl-In-A-Hole mood anymore

I knew, repeat K-N-E-W, that something was wrong yesterday. Around 3:00pm I got the uncontrollable urge to call him because suddenly, I got very worried. Gawd... my maternal instincts are going to be the death of me once I have kids

I wouldn't just disregard the whole conversation w/him in the earlier post. Just because he "seems" okay now, doesn't make it so. Women have a tendency to stick their head in the sand and ignore things because it is all of a sudden "fixed" for the time being or we want to see things that may or may not be there. You weren't overreacting....if he said those things to you about being uncertain, those feelings are still there. Don't sweep them under the carpet!!!

 

[Dye Tied]

I stopped browsing after my eyes and palms started to bleed.

I'd like to hear all 3 sides of the story

 

[vraiblonde]

I stopped browsing after my eyes and palms started to bleed.

You are so unromantic.

 

[cattitude]

What's wrong with any of that? It's true. You are surely not suggesting that men are these sensitive communication experts who always express their emotions and feelings in clear, concise language?

The ones that do aren't interested in women.

 

[Dye Tied]

You are so unromantic.

Do you really want me to sum up this thread?

 

[PrepH4U]

I wouldn't just disregard the whole conversation w/him in the earlier post. Just because he "seems" okay now, doesn't make it so. Women have a tendency to stick their head in the sand and ignore things because it is all of a sudden "fixed" for the time being or we want to see things that may or may not be there. You weren't overreacting....if he said those things to you about being uncertain, those feelings are still there. Don't sweep them under the carpet!!!

Just an observation - While he was driving home and intended to go to the hospital.... he couldn't text you or call you and let you know :shrug: That seems pretty thoughtless & uncaring right there as he knew you expected him home. He read your texts and didn't call, he "should" have known you would have been worried. Cell phone reception or not the hospital does have landlines I believe.
So as you make excuses for him, think about yourself... do you want to be treated as an "oh yeah" I should call her and let her know that I will be a day late coming home.
What the hell were you supposed to think, he was the one that stated he wasn't sure about your relationship and then pulls this crap. Oh hell no put your big girl panties on and show him the door.

 

[RedBaron]

Meanwhile...... i think i kinda summed it up w/my post(s). it was quoted. & i have the original 1 2. (elsewhere)

i think i made my point well known, meanwhile......

anything else is as it`s said, we`ll see. ya think?????

ya don`t have 2 read my post, but it has substance 2 it. i have it in it`s original txt. i keep my personal biz personal & privy.

not everything is Strictly Business. wow i can tipe wenn i wanna, all depends on 2 & with whom???????????

kinda like that 2n in my thread.

YouTube - Rob Thomas - Someday (Video)

If a dang nice guy can`t express from his heart what he feels, then u best get smart real dang quik; otherwise he`s pullin that bs outta his ass. time 2 walk. scru that noise, etc.............. Adieu


Originally Posted by Lance
Repost 4 OP. There is Life out There

I was nice, & said Hey. @ least she read my posts & could decipher what i tiped. Very few can. & what i said is nunyas biz. So there.

Me = Candid - Yep, Bold - heck Yeah, Confident = Dbl Hell Yeah.

Sometimes you have 2 give sum1 a fair chance. If he or she cannot more than just express themselves, either in writing or verbally or even telephonically without true feelings & emotion, then it`s def time 2 move on. ...........or confront it Str8 up & accept the outcome. Take a timeout, & enjoy things u may have in yr shallow bucket list. Any relationship has to have that Open Communication, w/o any bs. Hell, doesn`t take the smooth talk, etc... crap just b yrself. If it aint rite, & ya have that slightest reasonable doubt, that`ll b more than justa simple w/e. Bookwise is 1 thing, application in Real Life is another. Stupidity is/or can b a learned behavior. Becoming smarter & understanding from past bs, makes ya even smarter. Lotsa ppl have been slam dunked 4 i dumazz reason or another. (Oh do i know by just bein me) if sum1 says they haven`t, they`re liein. feel free 2 correct typos, sp, but the txt is only mine. I`m not shy 2 tell it like it is. i culda tiped it in cmplt txt. Hang in there Inmarsh, u`ll b k, U`ll Do. ;-)

c i can tipe if & wenn i wanna.

where eva this 2n may fit: wakeup call

YouTube - Rob Thomas - Someday (Video)

100% connexité et bien connecté



Saved For Posterity and Privity

 

[RedBaron]

dumazz Baboon c..n <^!^^

 

[Tigerlily]

So he just called me. Im at work so the conversation was unfortunately brief (hes convinced that me talking on my work phone will get me fired so he never talks long until I can call him from my cell phone once I get off work).

I asked him how his weekend was. He said "Good, until yesterday." Apperently Saturday they all had plans to go out drinking, so he didnt take his pain meds and left them in his hotel room. Well they all went out to dinner, etc. and he decided it be best for him to actually drive home because a lot of the guys got way too drunk wayyy too fast. So he ended up not drinking and driving everyone back to the hotel. He said it was really late but his back wasnt really bothering him (for once) so he didnt take any of his meds except his mild muscle relaxer just to ensure he stayed asleep.

So yesterday rolled around, they all checked out, said their goodbyes, and headed home. He said his stomach was upset the entire morning so he put off taking his more powerful meds. Once he got halfway home, however, he said his back was really bothering him so he tried to take something for it. Well he puked that something right back up, and continued to puke until about 3 pm when he realized that not only did he probably have food poisioning from dinner the night before, but he was also starting to go through mild detox. So he went to the hospital. Where he stayed for about 6 hours (until around 11:00pm or so) until he was keeping fluids and his meds down. Which explains the short midnight text saying "Yea Ill call you tomorrow."

Now, would I have liked to have heard from him once he got home? Yes. However, being in the hospital for 6 hours is a good enough for me for him to not call. Especially since there is no cell reception at Calvert Memorial. That and considering he was basically going through detox, Im sure the furthest thing from his mind was calling me. Plus when he isnt feeling well, he dosnt want anyone around him. All the more reason for him to not call me because he knows me - I would have driven straight to the hospital. Im not making excuses for him (like I said I would have liked to have heard from him once he got home, etc), but puking and being hooked to IVs in the hospital w/o cell signal is a pretty good excuse for not calling. But I digress...

So after he explained all this he said "Well Im gonna let you get back to work. I just wanted to call and say Hi. Why dont you give me a call or stop by on your way home? Ill be here until 9:00 but then I have to leave for work." I said that I'd probably stop by, he said "Ok sounds good. I hope you have a good day, babe. Ill see you later. I love you. Bye."

That part right there makes me think maybe I was overreacting juuusssttt a lil bit this weekend. Now like I said, Im not making excused for him. Im defintiely going to ask why in the H3LL he didnt call me all weekend and probably give him a little shyt about it. Maybe not today or tomorrow, but eventually Ill say something about it (a female never forgets). Honestly, when it comes down to it, Im just glad hes OK and him saying that "I love you" part seems like a good sign. Im not doing the happy dance yet - especially since Im a little irked about him not calling all weekend - but I'm definitely not in a I-Want-To-Crawl-In-A-Hole mood anymore

I knew, repeat K-N-E-W, that something was wrong yesterday. Around 3:00pm I got the uncontrollable urge to call him because suddenly, I got very worried. Gawd... my maternal instincts are going to be the death of me once I have kids

I really wish the best for you but IMO you have managed to validate every concern you have about your relationship when you should not have to. If a relationship is not meeting your needs then why would you wat to continue it?

You do realize that the stop by at 9pm tonight think is a "Booty Call" don't you? I know you love this guy but you need to not call, not be available and move on with your life. He is playing you like a puppet and you are going right along for the ride. I am a mother of a 20 yr old myslef and I wish that it would work out for you but if you voiced your concerns here then you new things were not right.

Never compromise who you are and what you want for anyone else. This will most likely be a learning experience for you and you will survive it. It will be painful but it will just be a step towards the life you will have later on. Life works in mysterious ways and this may very well be the light that you ned to realize that you can have more.

Validating uncaring and inconsiderate behavior of your partner lessens who you are and that is unfair to you. I would not call and yell or anything else I would just get up tommorow and do my best to put on a smile and go on with your life. If he really wants to make it work then he will get in line and do what needs to be done.

 

[smdavis65]

Oh dang, I can't read all that!

Here's my take...

Men aren't afraid of commitment. But they think very deeply about if they're making the right decision. No man wants to wind up divorced in 5, 10, 15, or 20 years.

I would say give him his time to think and be with his buddies. (And prep yourself like someone who is wise suggested)

You two have been through a lot together. Just on a hunch, that means a lot to him. Just like it does you.

You two are young, let him figure out what he wants. I think it will probably include you.

 

[vraiblonde]

Oh hell no put your big girl panties on and show him the door.

You are as unromantic as Dye.

Don't listen to her, LM. I think you should keep on doing what you're doing, since it obviously makes you happy and there's no problem.

 

[kwillia]

You are as unromantic as Dye.

Don't listen to her, LM. I think you should keep on doing what you're doing, since it obviously makes you happy and there's no problem.

I was going to tell Tigerlily she was "spot on", but I'm askeered you'll claim me to be an unromatic too...

 

[smdavis65]

To be clear, I know you didn't mean to and that was not your intent. It's just that we're a bunch of touchy wusses about our feelings when we get around to trying to sort them out.

Dammit! You just broke the Bro Code!!!

 

[Dye Tied]

I was going to tell Tigerlily she was "spot on", but I'm askeered you'll claim me to be an unromatic too...

There's no romance in this thread .

 

[smdavis65]

been there, lived that....

have to add to it though...the guy paints you as the psycho b!tch from he!! and plays the "poor me, look at what she has done/did to me" bullsh!t(all the while they were the one the caused the issues to end the relationship) and there is always one(or 2) that fall for the crap

as the psycho b!tch from he!!....all I got to say is, what comes around, goes around

Maybe you are... :shrug:

 

[onebdzee]

Maybe you are... :shrug:

and your point?

 

[toppick08]

There's no romance in this thread .

...wanna' August lilly...(purple, not the white ones)......they're blooming again.....

 

[toppick08]

Oh dang, I can't read all that!

Here's my take...

Men aren't afraid of commitment. But they think very deeply about if they're making the right decision. No man wants to wind up divorced in 5, 10, 15, or 20 years.

I would say give him his time to think and be with his buddies. (And prep yourself like someone who is wise suggested)

You two have been through a lot together. Just on a hunch, that means a lot to him. Just like it does you.

You two are young, let him figure out what he wants. I think it will probably include you.

last two minutes of this should sum it up....

 

[vraiblonde]

Men aren't afraid of commitment. But they think very deeply about if they're making the right decision. No man wants to wind up divorced in 5, 10, 15, or 20 years.

That is absolutely ridiculous. Guys are notorious for jumping into wedlock with some psycho who takes all their money and screws their best friend. I'll bet you yourself know at least 5 of them, and possibly you ARE one of them. Hell, these forums alone are filled with stories by these guys!!

I can't even believe you posted that!

 

[onebdzee]

That is absolutely ridiculous. Guys are notorious for jumping into wedlock with some psycho who takes all their money and screws their best friend. I'll bet you yourself know at least 5 of them, and possibly you ARE one of them. Hell, these forums alone are filled with stories by these guys!!

I can't even believe you posted that!

Right off the top of my head....hmmmmmm......I can name at least 2 that I know personally...if you give me a couple of minutes, I could prolly come up with the other 3