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Kain99
Guest
That's because you've never had incredible, mind blowing skirt before sweetie!Originally posted by justhangn
It would take a helluva lot more than a skirt to get me to church.
I a male and I have three boys but still can't get a date????
JabbaJawz
Be about it
I may be a hypocrite, but I've only dated one guy with a child since I've had my daughter, and wouldn't ever do it again. Granted, the experience with him was good b/c he had full custody and the Mom wasn't involved at all, but it was still an extra burden. The way I figured it, I was already bringing enough baggage into any relationship with my 1 child, adding more kids to the factor only makes things more complicated. I steered clear of dudes with kids, aside from that one guy...and he was actually the 1st guy I dated after splitting with my kid's dad, so that was a learning experience anyway.
If I'm divorced in 10 years, though, I probably won't be able to be so picky. Most people that are mid-30s and divorced have kids, and it's just something to deal with. At my age, though, there were several dudes w/out kids to choose from.
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crabcake
But wait, there's more...
i'm not tense :shrug: i just don't agree with peeps using their parental status as an excuse for not getting a date. 
if you can't get a date, it's because of 'you' ... not your kids ... if you think it's because of your kids, consider who their role model is, and you're back to square one -- you. 
Any woman worth your interest wouldn't rule you out because you have kids ... if she does, she doesn't want any/more kids for her own personal reasons, so things wouldn't work between the two of you anyway. :shrug: If she wants 'em but doesn't want yours, that doesn't say much for her compromise and "make things work" ability which is crucial to a relationship with children from previous relationships. (sounds like more of a 'my way or the highway' chic) and that's no good either. :shrug:
Point: focus on spending time with your kids and being a good dad when you're with them. it's your personal integrity, character and morals that would attract a mate; not how cute little johnny looks in his knickers while you're in the Disney store.
if you can't get a date, it's because of 'you' ... not your kids ... if you think it's because of your kids, consider who their role model is, and you're back to square one -- you. Any woman worth your interest wouldn't rule you out because you have kids ... if she does, she doesn't want any/more kids for her own personal reasons, so things wouldn't work between the two of you anyway. :shrug: If she wants 'em but doesn't want yours, that doesn't say much for her compromise and "make things work" ability which is crucial to a relationship with children from previous relationships. (sounds like more of a 'my way or the highway' chic) and that's no good either. :shrug:
Point: focus on spending time with your kids and being a good dad when you're with them. it's your personal integrity, character and morals that would attract a mate; not how cute little johnny looks in his knickers while you're in the Disney store.
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Kain99
Guest
It's your birthday so I won't say it.Originally posted by PFgal
I may be a hypocrite
crabcake
But wait, there's more...
Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Age?
so be it maybe there was more seriousness to your "wisecrack" than you think if you're getting this bent about it. I'm just stating my opinion ... and I didn't even cuss 
(I don't think 
)
Originally posted by Toxick
Oy ####ing vey.
Forget I said anything.
I wasn't trying to start this sort of sphincter-clenching. It was a stupid one line wisecrack.
I'm outta here.
so be it
maybe there was more seriousness to your "wisecrack" than you think if you're getting this bent about it. I'm just stating my opinion ... and I didn't even cuss (I don't think )
J
justhangn
Guest
Originally posted by Kain99
That's because you've never had incredible, mind blowing skirt before sweetie!
Actually, I have. 
and yet, if our being together hinged on going to Churchercise, I'd have to go find one that didn't. :shrug:
JabbaJawz
Be about it
I don't agree - I think I'm worth someone's interest and it's my own personal decision on how much baggage I'm willing to let enter a relationship. To me, 1 kid (mine) was plenty and I wasn't going to add more unecessarily. No reason to when there are many guys w/out kids to fish from.
The way I figure it, any relationship I entered that would lead to marriage already has the factor of 1 stepchild (mine) and I wanted any other kids to be between my husband and I.
I really don't think there's anything wrong with that mentality.
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Kain99
Guest
Toxick
Splat
Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Age?
I'm still with the mother of my children. And tickled to death about it. I've never even looked for attention from other women since I've known her, much less reveled in female attention due to the presense of my children.
What I'm getting bent about the reaction I'm getting about what I said, like it's a personal affront to you, and the accusatory tone you've taken toward me since I've said it.
The above quoted message in particular.
And for the record, because someone get's 'bent' at an accusation does not validate the accusation.
Originally posted by crabcake
so be it
I'm still with the mother of my children. And tickled to death about it. I've never even looked for attention from other women since I've known her, much less reveled in female attention due to the presense of my children.
What I'm getting bent about the reaction I'm getting about what I said, like it's a personal affront to you, and the accusatory tone you've taken toward me since I've said it.
The above quoted message in particular.
And for the record, because someone get's 'bent' at an accusation does not validate the accusation.
JabbaJawz
Be about it
Oh hush up, Pete,
I definitely disagree with CC, but that's okay - that's what forums are for. To me, it's not a selfish or 'my way or the highway issue.' It is personal preference - I wanted more kids, but maybe just 1 or 2 more. If I am already starting with 1, and he has 1 or 2...we'd have a whole freaking herd if we had more. Plus, we already have my kid to deal with, and I don't want the hassle of bringing in other kids who have their own ways/disciplinary issues, etc...
I see this as personal preference. I didn't date guys who smoked, just like I didn't date guys who did drugs, just like I didn't date guys w/kids... What's the problem w/that??
I'll be back...
crabcake
But wait, there's more...
you basically agreed with what I said (but may not realize it) ... It's not that you aren't "worth" meeting (like you are a bad person or whatnot) ... but by your statement, you make it clear that you don't want another person's kid/baggage to contend with since you have your own. That (to me) means "I don't want to have to compromise on someone else's kids/baggage b/c I have my own" which translates into "not someone B.E.D. should be worried about hooking up with".
I do think it is a bit hypocritical though to expect someone else to work around your (or mine, even) baggage, but you (or I) would eliminate someone else because they have some of their own. Personally, I'd prefer someone with some of the same "baggage" so they understand those demands and challenges as opposed to someone who's never around kids, doesn't understand day-to-day life with them, etc.
crabcake
But wait, there's more...
Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Age?
methinks you missed the part where I said "not you personally, tox" in my post 
my 'point' is simple ... i don't agree with kids being used as a means to achieving some objective for parents. if you (NOT YOU, PERSONALLY, TOX) have kids and use them to get something from someone, you had them for the wrong reasons. If you blame them (maybe not to their face, but imply such as this thread's subject) for your reasoning for not getting a date, then your shallowness in doing so is why you remain single. Period.
methinks you missed the part where I said "not you personally, tox" in my post my 'point' is simple ... i don't agree with kids being used as a means to achieving some objective for parents. if you (NOT YOU, PERSONALLY, TOX) have kids and use them to get something from someone, you had them for the wrong reasons. If you blame them (maybe not to their face, but imply such as this thread's subject) for your reasoning for not getting a date, then your shallowness in doing so is why you remain single. Period.
Gonna be one of those days, eh?
Devil, you're gonna have a hard time finding a gal your age that's interested in three kids. My advice (that it's too late for) is to stay with your baby Mommy/Daddy until the kids are grown or refrain from having kids with someone you may ditch later. Not that I did it BUT it's a lot easier that way.
Relationships are hard enough without the added burden of "yours, mine and ours". Larry and I manage to make it work but it's a tough go sometimes.
Devil, you're gonna have a hard time finding a gal your age that's interested in three kids. My advice (that it's too late for) is to stay with your baby Mommy/Daddy until the kids are grown or refrain from having kids with someone you may ditch later. Not that I did it BUT it's a lot easier that way.
Relationships are hard enough without the added burden of "yours, mine and ours". Larry and I manage to make it work but it's a tough go sometimes.
Crab, pull the stick out. It was just a joke.