I am the mother of "that child"

Ken King

A little rusty but not crusty
PREMO Member
Most of what has been said is fine and good, and I feel for those involved, but what if the child is one of them "broke people". They happen, we have instances of them throughout life. They might not be fixable. It truly may be a psychological issue and not physical or physiological. What then?
 

LightRoasted

If I may ...
If I may ...

Most of what has been said is fine and good, and I feel for those involved, but what if the child is one of them "broke people". They happen, we have instances of them throughout life. They might not be fixable. It truly may be a psychological issue and not physical or physiological. What then?

Electro shock therapy? Lobotomy?
 

littlelady

God bless the USA
I see that my fan club is alive and well! Good to know.

Foxxy, again, I hope the situation with your son is resolved soon. I wish you and your family well.
 

Clem72

Well-Known Member
Your response here indicates that you:

A) Think those processes actually work. Or
B) Enjoy and endorse torture.

Oh, Lobotomies definitely work (for curbing aggressive behavior / hyperactivity / hysteria). And believe it or not, they are not particularly painful (used to be an outpatient procedure). Side effects can be a bitch though.
 

Toxick

Splat

Toxick

Splat
Oh, Lobotomies definitely work (for curbing aggressive behavior / hyperactivity / hysteria). And believe it or not, they are not particularly painful (used to be an outpatient procedure). Side effects can be a bitch though.



I'm sure it can work sometimes.



If the patient is lucky enough not to be turned into a ####ing eggplant.
 

PsyOps

Pixelated
This was a very good post. physical stress and pain could cause one to be irritable, impatient, and short tempered without one even realizing what's going on. Even if he's one to procrastinate on using the bathroom, all that could be manifesting... and at least be part of the problem... and of course hunger too.

My thinking is the opposite though. Leaky gut is due to a poor diet; eating things that cause inflammation in the gut. It literally destroys the good bacteria. This good bacteria lines the inside of your colon and acts as a barrier from allowing toxins (literally poop) from leaking into your body. This can get into the blood stream the cells of your body. This causes your immune system to kick into overdrive to attack the toxins (free radicals) causing inflammation. This inflammation can also occur in the brain, causing a plethora of brain disorders. They call this system of bacteria the microbiome; often called the second brain. Many neurologists believe the brain is intricately connected to the microbiome, and whatever happens in the gut directly affects the brain. At the root of all of this is food - and to take a probiotic supplement, and eat prebiotic foods.
 

keekee

Well-Known Member
Just putting this out there...

I don't want this to be taken as being soft on bad behavior - so I hope I can word it right.
Have you approached this as a family challenge that you are ready to tackle together, alongside him?
Treat him as a participant in fixing this 'thing', and not as if you are trying to fix 'him'.
He is very obviously broken, but children are not dumb - and if you make his stake in it important,
maybe he will take more initiative in working thru his issues.
Let him know that you're not perfect parents, and that such a thing doesn't exist,
but that you care and that you are there to work beside him,
and make sure he knows that he is not perfect either, but that you can overcome it together.
I think it is important to make it very clear that you are on 'his' side - that you are not the opposition.
Each time he fails, but after he is stable again, tell him how he could have handled it differently.
I did this over and over with my kids and even though it seems to be a futile effort,
I do believe that some, if not all of it, sinks in.

I'm no psychiatrist - but I'm a mom of grown children. This approach worked very well with my 'spirited' boys,
although our struggles don't come close to yours.

I'd say, most importantly, make sure he knows that you're on his team. Even when he falls on his face.
Make sure that he owns his failures, and make it clear that they are not yours, but that he will do well by fixing them.

The fact that you have come this far shows that you really are on his team and
you may be the only hope that he has.

Maybe I'm way off-base, but just putting it out there as another approach.

Much Much Much love and luck to your family.
 

CRHS89

Well-Known Member
I don't think that I am wrong, but you said somewhere on the forum that you don't have children. Thus, you have no reason to be giving advice on the subject. If I were you, I would be working on your marriage; according to your other comments about your roofing accident. :smile:

I often think you get picked on needlessly. And then you make a comment like this.
 

Bann

Doris Day meets Lady Gaga
PREMO Member
I don't think that I am wrong, but you said somewhere on the forum that you don't have children. Thus, you have no reason to be giving advice on the subject. If I were you, I would be working on your marriage; according to your other comments about your roofing accident. :smile:


Why? Foxhound doesn't have children, and he's given input and indeed, helped me in many ways with Thing1, At a time when things were much more difficult with him, (Thing1) Foxhound had a lot of input which helped get me through many a challenge. Thing2 has moved on from teenager to adult and, at 21, has a great guy/buddy type of relationship with FH. However, Thing1 will always be developmentally delayed social-emotionally, and FH is more of a father-ish figure to him now.

When I was growing up, I had a Girl Scout leader who had no children. She became one of the most influential mentors in my life. I'm friends with her to this day, and she's almost like a 2nd or 3rd mother to me.

So you're flat out wrong.
 

littlelady

God bless the USA
I often think you get picked on needlessly. And then you make a comment like this.

If someone humiliates their spouse and calls her an idiot on a public forum, I just feel they shouldn't be giving advice on raising children. Just my opinion. Thanks for your input.
 

littlelady

God bless the USA
Why? Foxhound doesn't have children, and he's given input and indeed, helped me in many ways with Thing1, At a time when things were much more difficult with him, (Thing1) Foxhound had a lot of input which helped get me through many a challenge. Thing2 has moved on from teenager to adult and, at 21, has a great guy/buddy type of relationship with FH. However, Thing1 will always be developmentally delayed social-emotionally, and FH is more of a father-ish figure to him now.

When I was growing up, I had a Girl Scout leader who had no children. She became one of the most influential mentors in my life. I'm friends with her to this day, and she's almost like a 2nd or 3rd mother to me.

So you're flat out wrong.

So, I am flat out wrong? Forums generate different opinions. My opinion is different than yours, but it doesn't make me wrong or right; as does your opinion make you wrong or right. See how that works? Thanks for your opinion.
 

black dog

Free America
If someone humiliates their spouse and calls her an idiot on a public forum, I just feel they shouldn't be giving advice on raising children. Just my opinion. Thanks for your input.

If someone has a crackhead for a son and can't themselves keep on topic for more than two sentences they should shut the #### up too.
 
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