WASHINGTON, D.C.—The White House Press Conference took an awkward turn Wednesday morning when straight-faced Press Secretary Jen Psaki leaned into the microphone and stated, “There is no border crisis, there is no inflation, the Afghanistan withdrawal was flawless, the pandemic is over, the vaccines are safe and effective, and I am not Jen Psaki.”
CNN’s Kaitlan Collins raised her hand and said, “Thanks for taking my question, whoever you are. Could you tell us about President Biden’s health?”
Psaki responded, “President Biden is perfectly healthy. He is alive and not a robot being controlled by an elite hacker unit funded by George Soros and Xi Jinping. Also, I am an angel from the planet Zarkthreb who feeds on the souls of the gullible.”
MSNBC’s White House correspondent then asked, “What is the vaccination status of angels living on Zarkthreb?”
WASHINGTON, D.C.—The White House Press Conference took an awkward turn Wednesday morning when straight-faced Press Secretary Jen Psaki leaned into the microphone and stated, “There is no border crisis, there is no inflation, the Afghanistan withdrawal was flawless, the pandemic is over, the...
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