Say a prayer for hubby

Pasofever

Pasofever

Does my butt look big?
KAT20619 said:
Paso, you need to cut yourself some slack...reschedule some of these dogs. Whether you realize it or not you must take care of yourself if your to continue to take care of you husband and mother. This is the time to take all the help you can get and allow yourself as much rest and relaxation as possible. I went down a similar road many years ago and I can tell you it's gonna be a long slow haul and your gonna need every ounce of strength you can get. I am very familiar with closed head injuries, pm my if you like. I don't want to discourage you but I also would hate to hold out false hope....just take it one day at a time, sometimes that will have to be five minutes at a time, but you can do it. You have many friends to help you and lend you strength. BIG HUGS
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I did all my dogs .....the night went smoothly even with 2 full coated chows...anyway got so wound up I ended up in the jacuzzi and taking a benedryl at 2 am so I could sleep...and before I worked I was tired as shiat...

I have no false hope...I think he will be a window licker at best..he may suprise me...I am sure if he knew what was going on if he could make it harder on me he would..he always told me when mom was gone I was going to be taking care of him and he was going to be more vocal then mom and demanding...I am sure he will keep his promise..At times he was great others he was horrible...drugs and always in pain and high blood sugar make for a very irritable person..

Mom is great she is easy to get along with and causes NO problems at all..
 
M

Mousebaby

Guest
:huggy: I wish to God I could hug you in person. I am so sorry for all your hurt and turmoil. God knows if I could I would take it all away. God bless you and hang in there, you are doing a great job. You are one hell of a woman! :buddies:
 
KAT20619

KAT20619

kat
Hubby

Pasofever said:
I did all my dogs .....the night went smoothly even with 2 full coated chows...anyway got so wound up I ended up in the jacuzzi and taking a benedryl at 2 am so I could sleep...and before I worked I was tired as shiat...

I have no false hope...I think he will be a window licker at best..he may suprise me...I am sure if he knew what was going on if he could make it harder on me he would..he always told me when mom was gone I was going to be taking care of him and he was going to be more vocal then mom and demanding...I am sure he will keep his promise..At times he was great others he was horrible...drugs and always in pain and high blood sugar make for a very irritable person..

Mom is great she is easy to get along with and causes NO problems at all..
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Paso.....If he does not come out of this to some reasonable degree they you will probably need to put him in a long term care facility. As you have said your house is in his fathers name there should be no problem in getting maryland medicaid to help. They only count his assets and not knowing for sure but with the drugs and other problems I am aware of, I do believe the state would pick up the tab. There are just some that can not and should not be cared for at home. From what you have described he falls into that catagory. Don't even try to take that on yourself or you will be six feet under long before he is. You deserve a life to and just because he has said these things to you does not mean they will come true. There are many in his condition in local nursing homes...if he is not recognizing you or being responsive you may want to consider your options. I pray for you, you deserve to be happy. Big Hugs
 
Pasofever

Pasofever

Does my butt look big?
Thanks I said to his father that two would be hard to take care of ..he said mom will not be forever and then I should be able to handle Bill....he has a discharge date of Aug 2 from the rehab..not sure then how long his insurance will pay for something like St Marys ...We will see...Time will tell...
 
Dougstermd

Dougstermd

ORGASM DONOR
Pasofever said:
Yeah but last time she asked for that bull whip..I am thinking with volunteers not paid personnel we should not let her use the bull whip


Headed to the hosp they are talking about releasing Bill to the rehab...
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well the wip might be fun after the work is done:whistle:
 
KAT20619

KAT20619

kat
Hubby

Pasofever said:
Thanks I said to his father that two would be hard to take care of ..he said mom will not be forever and then I should be able to handle Bill....he has a discharge date of Aug 2 from the rehab..not sure then how long his insurance will pay for something like St Marys ...We will see...Time will tell...
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Forget what his father says....this is your life we are talking about. You are one person and doing the best you can. When his insurance runs out the social worker at the NH will most likely walk you thru the necessary steps to get him on medicaid. Let it happen. I to have an elderly mother and would put her care ahead of any man I have ever known and when the time comes to let her go you will hurt enough, you don't need the added burden of this man on your shoulders. Da*n it S. for once in your life think of yourself.
 
W

wineo

loving life
Paso, they are right. You need to think about yourself as well and your future. How old are you? How healthy are you? FIL will get over it. He is not offering to help take care of his daily needs and be there for assistance when needed with everyday chores, when Bill comes home is he?JMHO

Call me if I can help you in anyway.

Take care of yourself and the rest will come together:buddies:
 
edinsomd

edinsomd

New Member
KAT20619 said:
Forget what his father says....this is your life we are talking about. You are one person and doing the best you can. When his insurance runs out the social worker at the NH will most likely walk you thru the necessary steps to get him on medicaid. Let it happen. I to have an elderly mother and would put her care ahead of any man I have ever known and when the time comes to let her go you will hurt enough, you don't need the added burden of this man on your shoulders. Da*n it S. for once in your life think of yourself.
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I've stayed quiet, hoping for the best for you. This is solid advice.
JMHO, God Bless
Ed
 
Pasofever

Pasofever

Does my butt look big?
Just got back from the rehab....today is 5 weeks from the accident...The Dr's said everything I thought was "right on" asked me if I was a nurse I said no but if you get cut I could sew you up..they were surprised I knew about the Glasgow head trauma scale..and everything I see I am correct on...He is VERY behind on his progress the slower he is the higher percentage of lower success rate..(I know I am not saying this 100% but I hope you know what I mean) they are trying new meds now to "wake him up" he is a step ahead of coma which is minimal awareness (awake) state..he will open eyes look at you..not sure he knows what he sees..last week he looked but just straight ahead today when I yelled look at me he did cut his eyes toward me...I gave him a tittie twister on the rt side and he localized by trying to reach my hand with his right arm..he does not move the left at all (fx shoulder and ribs on that side) I did see him scratch his nose and he did it pretty good as he went slowly right to the nose and scratched and back down with the arm..

He goes back to shock trauma tomorrow as he has drainage from the neck surgery site (behind neck) he does shift and move head and make faces like the collar is bothering him I am sure it is the incision is right there and with a collar on must hurt...

Have a meeting Wed for family meeting and release information...they think he will be discharged from this rehab the first week of Aug..
 
mamissa3

mamissa3

New Member
I have been gone on vacation but just caught up on reading and wanted to let you know i thought of you often when i was gone......
 
backagain39

backagain39

New Member
Pasofever said:
Thanks I said to his father that two would be hard to take care of ..he said mom will not be forever and then I should be able to handle Bill....he has a discharge date of Aug 2 from the rehab..not sure then how long his insurance will pay for something like St Marys ...We will see...Time will tell...
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Pasofever you can not physically, emotionally or mentally take care of your husband and your mom at the same time. I understand that you want to respect your FILs wishes but unless he wants to come over every day and help you with the bed changing and the baths then I say you do what you need to do for you. Believe me I have been there done that.......I covered every angle, every option......your husband will be better off in a care facility....I know you will have guilt about this but making yourself sick trying to take care of two is not right either. You do what is right for you and don't worry about the relatives.....in time that takes care of itself. I wish you all the best. My best advice to you is to look into getting your husband's social security checks, he is disabled and it will help you with the bills. This is not a handout he worked for that money.
 
backagain39

backagain39

New Member
One more thing you need to know here......the insurance company is calling the shots on how long your husband stays in the hospital and where he goes from here and what type of facility that they will or will not pay for......

America's health system sucks big time..........
 
backagain39

backagain39

New Member
itsbob said:
Had to sneak that into this thread huh?

You know of anything better?
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I experienced this one first hand........insurance companies over ruling doctors.....all due to the almighty buck.......do not be fooled the insurance company seals your fate.

She needed to know this because the insurance company will make the final decision on where her husband can or can not go to, unless she is rich and can go anywhere.
 
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