After 9 years
- Thread starter Imthemom
- Start date
whome20603
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Cowgirl
Well-Known Member
MissKitty
New Member
And your adversary is not "in fact" a douchebag. They are, in your opinion, a douchebag.
JULZ
BFJ
I got 15 bucks on pixie 
Add to that my $20.
magic8ball
New Member
medicated
New Member
My 21 y/o and her 4 month old baby have been living with us since x-mas. On tues. judge ruled joint custody with father. She is breastfeeding, judge said " I don't want to hear about that feed the child a bottle". I respect the father wanting to see baby but don't agree with over night visitation with baby only 4 months old, and nursing. And since it is joint custody there is no child support, meaning my wife and I pay for everything. Daughters' lawyer ( which I'll end up paying for) said it was better for her case if she is not working.
Cowgirl
Well-Known Member
I don't know the circumstances (and don't want to know) but is there a reason you're assuming the father can't take perfectly good care of his child overnight? Are you just assuming that since he's a man he can't take care of the child?
MissKitty
New Member
Don't a lot of breastfeeding moms also pump and use bottles as well? I don't see it as a valid excuse to prevent visitation with the Dad. JMHO.
As for the joint custody and being no child support. I'm not understanding what your problem is with it. Why complain that you and your wife are paying for everything and in the same breath saying that you don't agree with over night visitation? If you allowed the visitation or the father having the kid jointly, he would incur half of the expenses.
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JULZ
BFJ
It sounds if, and I am only assuming this by the post, that the contention being the mother is breastfeeding and the 4 month old shouldn't be away from the mother overnights. However, breasts can be pumped and bottles provided for the overnight visits.
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Nickel
curiouser and curiouser
And doing a damn fine job if I may say so myself.She has kids..she didn't birth 'em but she's raising 'em.
Cowgirl
Well-Known Member
:fixed:
It goes both ways, right?I understand your frustration, because your loyalty is with your daughter. However, I think it's GREAT that the father wants to share in parenting with his daughter. The truth is, fathers can and do raise children just as well as mothers.
Cowgirl
Well-Known Member
JULZ
BFJ
Do you think the level of care will decrease because the baby will be with the dad? New mother's tend to think no one can take care of their baby as they would, whether the father is in the household or not. She will suffer from separation anxiety, of course, but if the dad is capable and wants to see his baby...:shrug:
SoMDGirl42
Well-Known Member
I understand what you're saying, and as a mom I'd have a hard time too, but you will have the people saying what about the father, he goes for 4 days without seeing his baby. Let's face facts, there is no right answer.
cattitude
My Sweetest Boy
S
shiki
Guest
If she's breastfeeding then three days is a long time. Maybe it's not PC to say but baby and mom are very attached. Baby may be attached to Daddy too but Mom is the meal...but dad shouldn't be deprived of getting to know his son. With care and feeding the baby and Daddy will bond as well.
But I can't help but imagine that if suddenly mom isn't there for days would be traumatic for the baby. Maybe they could ease into the arrangement. Child custody issues are very difficult and can get very emotional. Perhaps mom and dad can work something out together, mediation was excellent for me and my ex.
Good luck!