BS Gal
Voted Nicest in 08
Very addictive. Ignore the idiots.
I know. Not ready yet.You need a new kitty.
If he's dusty, why not?:shrug:
I've vacuum'd sand from my son's head before
Baby powder works MUCH better!
sweetprincess23
New Member
This is why I have vowed not to date another man with kids. Some people may think I am being selfish but the blending of families is too hard for me. I was with a man for 3+ years and our biggest problem was different parenting types. Believe it or not, I was the meany who didn't let the kids swing off doors, play on the steps, draw on the walls, etc. It was my fiance who let them run wild. I have 1 child, he had 2... all boys and close in age, I thought they would play good together and help around the house equally... I was way wrong. Between the baby mamma drama and different parenting styles, I say NO to baby daddy's.
Good for you.
That's how it is with me. I'm the so called "Mommy Dearest" according to my husband. In reality, it's just tougher being a good parent where you have to discipline and have rules, then it is to let them run wild. The biggest problem with us is the different parenting styles. Thank goodness his ex and I have a great relationship. I've included her in the 2 younger kids b-days, our xmas, etc.
meangirl
Nice lady!
If for some very odd reason I ever got divorced or something and dated again...he could not have little kids. They'd have to be grown and gone or something.
No way I want to deal with that stuff.My kids never had any chores at all until last year. I am trying finally to make them ready to be on their own.
I always had that SAHM guilt or something, I think.sweetprincess23
New Member
My theory on why fathers are so easy on the kids who come every other weekend... They don't want to be the bad parent, they want to be the friend not the parent. Actually that is what my ex told me, something like.. I only get them a few days a week I want it to be fun. This is BS! Last time I checked we are their parents, not their friends. They will make friends throughout life, but it is the responisiblity of a parent to teach our children responsibility, morals, kindness, etc. I want my son to come to me with problems, if he gets addicted to drugs, money problems or whatever I will be there for him, But I do not want a child who disrepects me or walks all over me because I am his friend not his mother. My son told me once I was not his friend anymore. I told him he was right, I am his mother who deserves respect.
I am glad to hear you get along with the mother. I grew up in a large family, my aunt's and uncle's are all divorced but the exes still come to family parties and still treated like family. I was totally off guard to find out what kind of mess I was getting myself into with my ex and the mother of his kids.
meangirl
Nice lady!
I just donned my flame retardent suit for this but...omg, come on. If you only get a kid for a weekend here and there, why in the frick would you make them clean, etc? My God. Really.
That's exactly what I think it is (not wanting to be the bad guy). But he also gets upset with me when I discipline our children, i.e.: at dinner when I'm correcting my son about something he's doing, husband complains about never having a quiet dinner!! That's just one of a many things!! The Ex and I don't have the same teaching styles, but I don't judge, although it's very frustrating at times when I hear about things that s/s is allowed to do and not do!!
K
Kain99
Guest
I fully agree. It would be wrong of a part time parent to inflict this torture on a child!
Really......
meangirl
Nice lady!
Can you be more specific? I'm not getting your problem with this child.
rack'm
Jaded
Yea, beyond the child cleaning up their own mess, it seems rediculous to make them do chores around the house.
meangirl
Nice lady!
I fully agree. It would be wrong of a part time parent to inflict this torture on a child!
Really......
And there it is. Done.
meangirl
Nice lady!
Yea, beyond the child cleaning up their own mess, it seems rediculous to make them do chores around the house.
Exactly. Thank you.
They do not live there. They are pretty much just a visitor really. Do people really make guests clean their house??
K
Kain99
Guest
sweetprincess23
New Member
1. Most likely the full time parent probably has the kid do chores or at least clean up after themselves. So if the part-time parent makes it nothing but a fun visit guess what happens... Kid doesn't want to live with mean full-time parent who makes them follow rules, kid wants to live with fun part-time parent. This will involve years of child putting full-time parent down and always sticking up for fun parent, begging to live with part-time parent making full-time parent feel bad.
2. Obviously a kid who doesn't spend 100% of time in a house shouldn't have to clean up after everyone while they sat around doing nothing. But the child should be expected to help around the house a bit, clean their room or shared playroom if they also made a mess. My point was you can't expect the kids who live in a home 100% of the time to clean up after themselves but when the step kids come around now step-daddy is cleaning up after his kids. Does that sound fair?
3. I may have gotten a bit off topic, I was think more of my situations. Like when the step-son drew on the walls, flushed toys down the toilet, ran back in forth across the street and almost got hit by a car (just a few examples) and never got in trouble. But when my son didn't want to eat all his veggies, he got sent to his room. I am sure I was not perfect in making everyone feel equal, obviously every parent is going to defend their child. I can honestly say I was hardest on my child at first, trying to make the step-kiddies feel comfortable but when I noticed the step-kiddies NEVER getting in trouble I was a bit disappointed.