How much do you tell your s/o about your past?

Qurious

Qurious

Im On 1.
I unfortunetly made the mistake of telling him all of my business before we got together. We were best friends, I didnt think it was a big deal....until we got involved and then my past was brought up everytime we got into an arguement.

Do you think there are certain things you should and shouldn't tell your s/o before you two get seriously involved?

:popcorn:
 
Suz

Suz

33 yrs & we r still n luv
Qurious said:
I unfortunetly made the mistake of telling him all of my business before we got together. We were best friends, I didnt think it was a big deal....until we got involved and then my past was brought up everytime we got into an arguement.

Do you think there are certain things you should and shouldn't tell your s/o before you two get seriously involved?

:popcorn:
Click to expand...
He sounds like my father! RUN QUICK!!!

I have (and still do) kept nothing from my husband. But he is very secure in his life, our love and respect for one another etc.

It really probably depends on the individual. If he/she is insecure, then they won't be able to handle it on a mature level. JMO
 
BadGirl

BadGirl

I am so very blessed
There is a reason the word "past" has a fine description in the dictionary. Unless there is something that would harm or injure your SO, there is no need to mention your prior activities or indescretions to him. Of course, as the relationship evolves, and your comfort level feels at ease, it is more appropriate to mention more of your past, but not necessarily all of it. But remember this: the more you reveal of yourself, the more that can, and will be, used against you at any time.

But I have lived a pretty tame life, so no real worry of something that I've done being used against me. Boring can be nice and safe. :biggrin:
 
S

Schizo

Guest
Qurious said:
I unfortunetly made the mistake of telling him all of my business before we got together. We were best friends, I didnt think it was a big deal....until we got involved and then my past was brought up everytime we got into an arguement.

Do you think there are certain things you should and shouldn't tell your s/o before you two get seriously involved?

:popcorn:
Click to expand...


Sooo.. What kind of past did you have that's so interesting? :jerry:
 
Suz

Suz

33 yrs & we r still n luv
SeaRide said:
Every time? then get rid of him period.

Try imagine him doing this for the rest of YOUR LIFE. Geez.
Click to expand...
yep, do just that. I wish my mom had.
 
CityGrl

CityGrl

Time for a nap
I guess it's different since I'm divorced, but I felt that all of the skeletons had to come out of the closet before my relationship with the s/o was "true."

Honesty is the best policy, even if you did crazy things. :lmao:
 
Toxick

Toxick

Splat
Qurious said:
until we got involved and then my past was brought up everytime we got into an arguement.
Click to expand...


It doesn't sound like you're the one with the problem.

Someone who throws your past in your face when you have an argument is someone who will desperately try to win any argument at all costs. Being right or arriving at the truth is not the point - WINNING is the point.


I hate dealing with people like that.
 
PJumper

PJumper

New Member
Qurious said:
I unfortunetly made the mistake of telling him all of my business before we got together. We were best friends, I didnt think it was a big deal....until we got involved and then my past was brought up everytime we got into an arguement.

Do you think there are certain things you should and shouldn't tell your s/o before you two get seriously involved?

:popcorn:
Click to expand...


The past is just that, "the past" and should not be mentioned in the present. If your S/O married you for love, then it should be unconditional, regardless of your past.
 
Qurious

Qurious

Im On 1.
Toxick said:
It doesn't sound like you're the one with the problem.

Someone who throws your past in your face when you have an argument is someone who will desperately try to win any argument at all costs. Being right or arriving at the truth is not the point - WINNING is the point.


I hate dealing with people like that.
Click to expand...

He wants to be right and what great a time to prove that by throwing up something I did 3 years ago. I've changed and matured, im NOT the same person I was....

"i have to know what you did 3 years ago, otherwise we can't be together"

why??? so you can throw it up in my face every chance you get?

Think im going to have to let this one go...I tried. But I think its an obsession, he needs to know everything about me to trust me and Im telling him THAT KNOWING EVERYTHING IS NOT GOING TO MAKE YOU TRUST ME ANY MORE THAN YOU DO NOW!!!

Physco!!! :lmao:
 
Qurious

Qurious

Im On 1.
PJumper said:
The past is just that, "the past" and should not be mentioned in the present. If your S/O married you for love, then it should be unconditional, regardless of your past.
Click to expand...

We arent married.
 
dustin

dustin

UAIOE
Qurious said:
He wants to be right and what great a time to prove that by throwing up something I did 3 years ago. I've changed and matured, im NOT the same person I was....

"i have to know what you did 3 years ago, otherwise we can't be together"

why??? so you can throw it up in my face every chance you get?

Think im going to have to let this one go...I tried. But I think its an obsession, he needs to know everything about me to trust me and Im telling him THAT KNOWING EVERYTHING IS NOT GOING TO MAKE YOU TRUST ME ANY MORE THAN YOU DO NOW!!!

Physco!!! :lmao:
Click to expand...
Have you told him that's how you feel?
 
Qurious

Qurious

Im On 1.
dustin said:
Have you told him that's how you feel?
Click to expand...

Of course!! Its either his way or the highway...i better get packin if he can't let my past go by now...he never will...
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top