Ladies: Your on a date, the check comes...

[lillymay]

Most of the dates I've been on lately the guy expects you to pay for your half :shrug: So if the guy did whip out his card to pay for both of us, I'd probably be so floored with the idea that "WOW!! He was going to pay the whole tab on his own!!!" I'd gladly lend him my card and hope for a second date and chaulk it up as just a card glitch or something. Its the thought that counted.

Good God! Who in the hell are you dating and what gutter are you finding them in! Never ever pay for anything ever! I don't care if it's the first or 21st date. And you'd gladly lend him your card and hope for a 2nd date! That's pathetic, really and it's not the thought that counted! Didn't your momma teach you anything!

 

[Nickel]

Never ever pay for anything ever!

 

[lillymay]

And?

 

[Angel]

Halves seems fair to me. I pay for mine and you pay for yours. Back when I was dating I never expected the guy to pay for my meal. To this day I still offer to pay for mine and the man and I have been together almost 6 years. If he and I were on the first date and he expected me to pay for the entire meal, I'd pay for it, but that would be the end of it.

 

[Nickel]

And?

:shrug: I just never felt comfortable allowing my husband (when we were dating) to pay for everything at the beginning of our relationship. We split our first date, and usually took turns treating each other to dinner or a movie or something. :shrug:

 

[Mikeinsmd]

Halves seems fair to me. I pay for mine and you pay for yours. Back when I was dating I never expected the guy to pay for my meal. To this day I still offer to pay for mine and the man and I have been together almost 6 years. If he and I were on the first date and he expected me to pay for the entire meal, I'd pay for it, but that would be the end of it.

If I ask you out, I expect to pay and have no problem with it. Now if you came off like Lilymay, it'd be your last date with me.

I have no tolerance for moochers who EXPECT him to always pay. You want equal rights baby, it works both ways.

 

[crabcake]

I was on a lunch date with a guy a couple months ago, and the bill comes. He was (until then) Mr. Chivalry, so I figured he would probably get lunch since he seemed to be courteous/gentlemanly like that. I don't "expect" things like this, but I admire a man who practices a little old-fashioned chivalry on occasion, and all indications pointed in that direction for lunch.

Anywho, the bill comes, he puts down some bills (I didn't notice how much). The waiter comes and says "Are we ready here?" motioning to the check. Mr. Chivalry says, "Uhhh, not yet. I think only one of us has covered our meals" as he nods at me. I'm mortified; the waiter is like . I tell the waiter to hold on; hand him my debit card, and throw the bills back at the azzhole, and told him to keep it.

If he was that lacking in tact, he is probably more hard-up for the $10 than me, and in that case, I don't mind bashing his petrified ego in the presence of strangers like he ignorantly did to me. The least he could have said was, "Hey, ya mind if we go Dutch." Or, "I'll get this one; you get the next?" Or found some other private tactful way to communicate the dutch plan vs. in front of someone stranger. Kinda makes me wish I'd have asked for the waiter's phone number in front of him as well.

 

[morganj614]

Most of the dates I've been on lately the guy expects you to pay for your half :shrug: So if the guy did whip out his card to pay for both of us, I'd probably be so floored with the idea that "WOW!! He was going to pay the whole tab on his own!!!" I'd gladly lend him my card and hope for a second date and chaulk it up as just a card glitch or something. Its the thought that counted.

The only time a guy expected me to pay half was when I didn't let him cop a feel at the movies...I pretended not to hear his statement that I should pay half...

I usually offer to pay half at least, but it has always been turned down. It is nice to offer.
With my latest guy...he did let me pay for a dinner after a few months. I had always offered and it was declined. When he felt comfortable, he let me treat.
If the thread scenario had happened...the ass would be washing dishes while I was safe at home with a nice Merlot

 

[Mikeinsmd]

I was on a lunch date with a guy a couple months ago, and the bill comes. He was (until then) Mr. Chivalry, so I figured he would probably get lunch since he seemed to be courteous/gentlemanly like that. I don't "expect" things like this, but I admire a man who practices a little old-fashioned chivalry on occasion, and all indications pointed in that direction for lunch.

Anywho, the bill comes, he puts down some bills (I didn't notice how much). The waiter comes and says "Are we ready here?" motioning to the check. Mr. Chivalry says, "Uhhh, not yet. I think only one of us has covered our meals" as he nods at me. I'm mortified; the waiter is like . I tell the waiter to hold on; hand him my debit card, and throw the bills back at the azzhole, and told him to keep it.

If he was that lacking in tact, he is probably more hard-up for the $10 than me, and in that case, I don't mind bashing his petrified ego in the presence of strangers like he ignorantly did to me. The least he could have said was, "Hey, ya mind if we go Dutch." Or, "I'll get this one; you get the next?" Or found some other private tactful way to communicate the dutch plan vs. in front of someone stranger. Kinda makes me wish I'd have asked for the waiter's phone number in front of him as well.

What a loser!!!

 

[crabcake]

Halves seems fair to me. I pay for mine and you pay for yours.

I'm totally okay with that ... and have gone Dutch on many occasions. I don't expect any man to foot the bill for anything for me. I am, however, appreciative if he choses to do so. And I don't have a problem picking up the tab on occasion as well. I only expect a little respect/courtesy/tact in dealing with the issue.

 

[Mikeinsmd]

I'm totally okay with that ... and have gone Dutch on many occasions. I don't expect any man to foot the bill for anything for me. I am, however, appreciative if he choses to do so. And I don't have a problem picking up the tab on occasion as well. I only expect a little respect/courtesy/tact in dealing with the issue.

Agreed. I don't even mind paying if we're just friends (not a date).

I think Qurious opening post leads responses though. WHat guy goes out on a date with no cash??

 

[crabcake]

What a loser!!!

I know, right! We're talking about lunch here ... a couple of sandwiches at a pub-sorta place. The total bill wasn't even $20 (food, drinks, tax & tip) for crying out loud!

 

[crabcake]

Agreed. I don't even mind paying if we're just friends (not a date).

I think Qurious opening post leads responses though. WHat guy goes out on a date with no cash??

I'm with ya! I'll grab lunch for my g/f's at work sometimes, and they grab lunch for me from time to time. It all comes out in a wash, so :shrug:. That said, though, there is one chic there who we don't even ask anymore because she NEVER pays you back or returns the favor. That crap gets OLD afterwhile.

I'm curious if the guy Q mentions even tried calling the bank? Or asking them to manually enter the numbers. I've had my card decline before simply b/c the strip is scratched and the card itself is bent (that baby gets quite a work-out). But I tell them to manually enter the numbers, or let me swipe it, as I know how to hold it and put pressure on the bend in the right spot and it works every time.

 

[slotted]

usually took turns treating each other to dinner or a movie or something. :shrug:

The Bro System.

 

[Chasey_Lane]

Pay for my dinner and wave good-bye to the loser.

That's not very nice. I've had my cc declined (debit card actually) because I won't over my "spending limit" in a day. Some stupid thing the bank puts on and it is usually around Christmas time that this has happened.

 

[BS Gal]

I would just run like the wind.

 

[L8trHtr]

Dutch is ALWAYS best!

 

[BS Gal]

Dutch is ALWAYS best!

So, you've met him? He's a sweetie.

 

[Chasey_Lane]

Anywho, the bill comes, he puts down some bills (I didn't notice how much). The waiter comes and says "Are we ready here?" motioning to the check. Mr. Chivalry says, "Uhhh, not yet. I think only one of us has covered our meals" as he nods at me. I'm mortified; the waiter is like . I tell the waiter to hold on; hand him my debit card, and throw the bills back at the azzhole, and told him to keep it.

I'm not sure why you would call him an a-hole for this. He put down money and you didn't know how much, but assumed he covered the entire bill. You didn't offer, but he never spoke up before the waiter came back around. But I don't consider him an azz because he didn't pay for the whole meal. Or maybe I'm just missing the point? :shrug:

 

[Sharon]

I've had my cc declined (debit card actually) because I won't over my "spending limit" in a day. Some stupid thing the bank puts on and it is usually around Christmas time that this has happened.

What bank do you use? I never heard of a spending limit on a debit card. I've heard of cash limits at ATM's but why would a bank limit you from your OWN money?