Parental Differences/Disagreement

[Nanny Pam]

You white peoples is crazy, what that kid nees is a good butt whiping when she gets outta line. When my son Leroy tries to raise up on me, I just wax em.

once again...STFU

 

[crabcake]

crabby, mentioning the ADHD meds to a teacher MAY backfire on you too...so be VERY careful when talking to her teachers. some feel the same way as smoothmarine and your daughter will suffer for it. talk to the principal beforehand to be sure the teachers are EDUCATED about it. then proceed with discussing it with the teachers....

Trust me -- if my daughter's teacher was an anti-med/anti-adhd type, she wouldn't be her teacher. She's actually done pretty well so far, and is very communicative when it comes to her classroom issues/behavior (most of which is good). There is a good dialogue all around.

 

[happyappygirl]

Trust me -- if my daughter's teacher was an anti-med/anti-adhd type, she wouldn't be her teacher. She's actually done pretty well so far, and is very communicative when it comes to her classroom issues/behavior (most of which is good). There is a good dialogue all around.

you're such a good mommy
Good job!
and Good luck.

 

[aps45819]

I'm in a similar situation with my son. I think the problem is his mother but there is now way I would just abruptly stop his meds. That would be an ignorant thing to do.

 

[happyappygirl]

I'm in a similar situation with my son. I think the problem is his mother but there is now way I would just abruptly stop his meds. That would be an ignorant thing to do.

apps it is your right to request his drs records to be sure she's done what she should. if you doubt it get your own second opinion. she might appreciate it.

 

[smoothmarine187]

I'm skipping all of it and just loading my son full of morphine and home schooling him. that way he will never endure any hardships or have to learn any discipline. Maybe that will make me the worlds #1 dad! I think I'm going to buy one of those shirts right now!

 

[Nicole_in_somd]

Any suggestions on how to handle a difference of opinion when it comes to medication? DQ is taking Daytrana for ADHD prescribed by her pediatrician who has consulted with both a psychiatrist and psychologist on her case for over a year now ... point being, we didn't just run out and buy this on the black market to make her behave. I've done my research, we've gotten second opinions, etc., and after some trial-and-error with other meds, we've finally found one that works great for her, doesn't zombie her out, and basically lets her be her with a little help in the focus/concentration department.

So, DQ spends the week with her dad for Thanksgiving, and when I asked her if she'd remembered her patch each day, she said "Daddy said I shouldn't use it; that I should be able to control myself without medication." So I ask, "How do you feel?" And she responds, "I feel like I need it to help me concentrate and behave better. I'm not behaving as well as when I don't wear it." So I ask dad, "WTF?" He said she didn't need it, that she was behaving fine without it, and he didn't want her taking it.

Now, my first thought is -- you no-medical-degree-having/non-researching ass, jacked up from your own childhood issues, Tom Cruise-wannabe MFer ... then my second thought is, "if her pediatrician has prescribed it under the consult with the chief psychiatrist at a very well-respected medical facility, isn't it parental neglect to not provide her with the medication for which she is prescribed?

How do I address this? I'm really pissed off at the fact that after all the time invested in finding something to work for her, and to have HER say she knows it works for her, and to see the results of her being on something that works for her (e.g., her recent acceptance into the academically gifted program), he takes it upon himself and his non-doctor-consulting self to just not give it to her.

Suggestions?

do you have full custody or joint?

 

[Nicole_in_somd]

I could understand if she had some terminal illness and she had to take the medication or she would become very sick, but this is only for ADHD. If my X-wife put my kids on that crap, I wouldn't give it to them either. She only thinks she needs to be on it now, because of you and other doctors telling her that she needs it.

realy, they only "think" they need it? Please back up your statements. I would be interested in your educational background or experince for you to make such a statement.

 

[smoothmarine187]

realy, they only "think" they need it? Please back up your statements. I would be interested in your educational background or experince for you to make such a statement.

If you tell a kid over and over again that they need it, they are eventually going to believe it! its not really difficult to figure out.

 

[aps45819]

apps it is your right to request his drs records to be sure she's done what she should. if you doubt it get your own second opinion. she might appreciate it.

Have all that but he behaves differently when he's with me. I've had folks express suprise when they find out it's the same kid after seeing him when he's with his mom (including one doctor). Mom gets excited and loses her temper. For some reason, she doesn't understand it when he emulates her.

 

[smoothmarine187]

I'm in a similar situation with my son. I think the problem is his mother but there is now way I would just abruptly stop his meds. That would be an ignorant thing to do.

I would get second opionions and fight it, I don't care how much the court costs are.

 

[Nicole_in_somd]

If your X can handle her when she is not on it, then why does it matter? Just put her back on it when she gets home. Sorry, its just hard for me to get into this subject without being biased. My son's teacher wanted to put him on that stuff, because she couldn't handle him. He always told me that the teacher was really boring and he acted that way because he was bored out of his mind. I got into it quite a few times with his teacher, but guess what, this year he has a new teacher and she thinks he's great.....and he gets good grades.

It does not have anything to do with her ex handling the child. It has to do with the child and how she is feeling, not taking the medications as prescribed is not advisable. Your sons teacher does not have the background or the education to put any child or anything.

It has been clearly said that professionals have investigated into this and research was conducted coupled with the fact the girl herself admitted to feeling better with it.

 

[aps45819]

If you tell a kid over and over again that they need it, they are eventually going to believe it! its not really difficult to figure out.

You're an idiot. The behavior is directing the meds, not the need to sell a prescription

 

[smoothmarine187]

Have all that but he behaves differently when he's with me. I've had folks express suprise when they find out it's the same kid after seeing him when he's with his mom (including one doctor). Mom gets excited and loses her temper. For some reason, she doesn't understand it when he emulates her.

Exactly! Its all about the person teaching/raising them.

 

[Nicole_in_somd]

you could have gotten him a new teacher LAST year. that's your right as a parent. enact it. your kid also has to know it's not appropriate behavior to disrespect a teacher while YOU are trying to do something about the situation, he won't get along with every single teacher he has for the rest of his education. Did you?

the issue is these meds are cumlative...meaning you can't give it sporadically, it's like allergy medicine. it has to be maintained at a constant level if i remember correctly. my nephew was on it. With that said it is NOT the decision a teacher should make, Crabby has gone the right route. Kudos to you!

BEST POST EVER!

 

[smoothmarine187]

You're an idiot. The behavior is directing the meds, not the need to sell a prescription

Dumb ass, I'm agreeing with you. The parents can't handle the children so they take them to a doctor. Then the doctors and the parents lead the children to believe that they need the medication. Eventually the child will think that he/she needs to be medicated in order to function normally.

 

[Nicole_in_somd]

You white peoples is crazy, what that kid nees is a good butt whiping when she gets outta line. When my son Leroy tries to raise up on me, I just wax em.

MPD go away...you are not funny or entertaining.

 

[Nicole_in_somd]

oh and that will make him become the model citizen his daddy is...avoidin' da man, low riding in his tinted window'd escalade, packin' and druggin'

happy don't waste your time. It is a MPD. nothing more trying to stir shait up.

 

[aps45819]

Dumb ass, I'm agreeing with you. The parents can't handle the children so they take them to a doctor. Then the doctors and the parents lead the children to believe that they need the medication. Eventually the child will think that he/she needs to be medicated in order to function normally.

That's NOT the point of discussion.
The kids on meds.
Daddy abruptly stops them. That's BAD for the kid.

 

[Nicole_in_somd]

Thats my point exactly! Why would I switch out his teacher? then he would think that everytime things got hard, he could just bail out. I know he won't get along with every teacher, my point being, he didn't need drugs to make him focus. He just needed a better teacher, but believe me we worked on it alot. Anyway, sorry for ruining this thread, I won't post again because I can't get into this subject without getting pissed off.

I guess you could threaten your X, and tell him that you are going to take him to court if he does it again. I would rather have my son/daughter there on drugs, then not see them at all.

It had nothing to do with the teacher and everything to do with the child.
Just because your child thought the teacher was boring did not give him the right to not take the class seriously.

I think this is two different cases Marine. Many people do not think it is right to medicate a child but that thinking is dated to a point.

Many cases these children do need medication and we are now finding out more and more about it. Not all children need it but many do and if it helps then why not.