Question for the men

migtig

migtig

aka Mrs. Giant
vraiblonde said:
Well, no they won't. Because the spouse will ##### to her friends and not him. :jet:
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No. Somebody will walk. Either the person who has problems communicating will, because they can't communicate what they need or want effectively. Or the other party will because they are tired of being treated like crap.

I'd much rather resolve issues with anybody I have a conflict with regardless of my relationship status. It makes me healthier and happier. Of course, I don't know if I can get much happier. That would be annoying. :lmao:
 
migtig

migtig

aka Mrs. Giant
Tonio said:
I'm saying that the one with the deeper emotional issues has to address those on his or her own. The other spouse can be supportive, but it's out of the spouse's control. At the risk of sounding like Dr. Phil, the one with the issues has to want to change.
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You know Tonio, I've already told you I :love: you, but I really really :love: you!! :smoochy:
 
D

Dr. Fill

Guest
Tonio said:
I'm saying that the one with the deeper emotional issues has to address those on his or her own. The other spouse can be supportive, but it's out of the spouse's control. At the risk of sounding like Dr. Phil, the one with the issues has to want to change.
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Right on target, my friend. Check out my advice on Maintaining a Successful Relationship. Take a minute or two to take the Relationship Health Profile Test linked at the bottom of the page. :yay:
 
Larry Gude

Larry Gude

Strung Out
Revision...

Larry Gude said:
...it goes something like this;

Larry: "My wife never helps around the house."

Anonymous #1: "yeah! Mine neither!"

Tonio: "My wife is perfect."

Annony #2: "Yep. Every time I can't find the remote she dusting or vacuuming or some such and just can't be bothered to help."

Larry: "Yeah, and whats with the TV. She's always gotta have that going on?"

#1 " Yep. Like clock work."

#2 "Never fails. The game coems on and NOW that needs to be cleaned. Dust, dust, dust..."

Speedo: "Elaine can be such a #####."

Annonymous #3 "Yeah! Least she could do is look for the remote while she's doing that, but nooooo..."

Larry "Right, so I'm like, "Dear, this is a big play! It's third and three and that kid was drafted specifically to pick up 3rd and threes, so, could you hold up a minute with the dusting?!"

#2 "Yeah! And then they get all pizzy "If you EVER want sex again I WILL have a clean house..."

Tonio: "My wife would never say that. If she did, I wouldn't talk about it."

#1 "Yeah! That's just rude. I never once tell her she can't have sex if I don't find the remote."

#3 "Rude. Just rude. He pick up the first down?"

Speedo "In fact, she cab be a hella beyotch..."

Larry "So, it's this ENOURMOUS deal, it has to be dusted RIGHT now and I'm just minding my own business, watching the game, out of her way..."

#2 "And they get all rude."

#3 "Where was the remote?"

#1 "No communication either. I got a beer. I got the game on. I'm sitting there. You guys are on the way over. Pizza's been called in. What else I gotta say?"

Larry "It's like you have actually spell it out or something..."

Tonio: "Do you think they can hear us?"

Bill "#### them..."

Larry "Only after the house is clean!"

#2 "Like, dear, it's SUNDAY, SUN-DAY. Right...hel-oooo"

#3 "Yeah, and no remote. Do you have to write it down or what?"

Larry "Then the dishawsher has to be run..."

#2 "Yep. It's like, the other half of the sink has NOTHING in it and they HAVE to turn that on...and laundry. I still got them colored socks yet."

#1 "And the vaccuming cleaner. She just did that last week..."

Tonio "I'm feeling uncomforatable right now..."

Larry "And the week before that and the week before that..."

#3 "Hey! I didn't look in the sink? Maybe that's where the remote it!"

Speedo "My ##### wife probably put it there."

Same stuff, time and again. You just try and share feelings and cope.
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The names have not been changed to protect the guilty...
 
vraiblonde

vraiblonde

Board Mommy
PREMO Member
Patron
migtig said:
No. Somebody will walk. Either the person who has problems communicating will, because they can't communicate what they need or want effectively. Or the other party will because they are tired of being treated like crap.
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Wait a minute - we're not talking about major relationship problems here. Women tend to group-##### about common annoying guy traits, not big problems. The big problems get hashed with one or two good friends, not a gaggle of women or the gals at the convenience store.

"Why can't he just take the fricken trash out??? Can he not see that it's obviously overflowing??"
"Jeez, maybe some all-important football game was on. :sarcasm: You know how men can't possibly be disturbed while the game is on."
"Okay, but what about at commercial???"
"Obviously they want to use commercial time for game analysis :sarcasm: Don't you know anything?"
"Arrrgggh!! I'm going to kill him!!!"

This is the sort of thing women have a BF about. Is it worth divorcing your spouse because he watches football and doesn't take the trash out? NO! But it IS worth #####ing about.
 
migtig

migtig

aka Mrs. Giant
vraiblonde said:
Wait a minute - we're not talking about major relationship problems here. Women tend to group-##### about common annoying guy traits, not big problems. The big problems get hashed with one or two good friends, not a gaggle of women or the gals at the convenience store.

"Why can't he just take the fricken trash out??? Can he not see that it's obviously overflowing??"
"Jeez, maybe some all-important football game was on. :sarcasm: You know how men can't possibly be disturbed while the game is on."
"Okay, but what about at commercial???"
"Obviously they want to use commercial time for game analysis :sarcasm: Don't you know anything?"
"Arrrgggh!! I'm going to kill him!!!"

This is the sort of thing women have a BF about. Is it worth divorcing your spouse because he watches football and doesn't take the trash out? NO! But it IS worth #####ing about.
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Okay. I see what you are saying. However, I don't find that worth biyatching about. :shrug: If I have a problem I either bring it up with that person, or completely let it go, because it's so trivial it isn't worth aggravating me.

Let's say I am at "tonio's" house cause he's my man. He's watching tv, while I am cleaning up in the kitchen, putting away clean dishes, rinsing off the dirty ones, and I see the trash is overflowing. I look at it for a second or two and then pick up the trash, take it to the bin, and put in a new liner. Next time I see one of my friends I am not going to biyatch about taking out "Tonio's" trash while he was sitting in his recliner watching tv. I'm going to be talking about the fun and exciting things in my life and asking about the fun and exciting things in their life... :shrug:
 
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