Shared Physical Custody

[RoseRed]

It's ok for you to call him and disturb him when he might be doing something "important"(getting them ready for school, breakfast, etc)....but, it's not ok for him to do it?

:doublestandarddramaqueen:

 

[bresamil]

No, I typically call him the morning after his night and ask him how it went because that way we can also discuss school events and other activities.

I use email for that. List the activities. Actually I send a calendar of events every month via email to both he and his wife. She's the best one at keeping everything straight.

 

[sushisamba]

It's ok for you to call him and disturb him when he might be doing something "important"(getting them ready for school, breakfast, etc)....but, it's not ok for him to do it?

I call him on his cell after the kids are at school. And if he doesn't answer, I leave a message, and if he doesn't call back, I don't question him about why he didn't. I act like an adult and patiently wait to be with my kids again and ask them.

 

[RoseRed]

I call him on his cell after the kids are at school. And if he doesn't answer, I leave a message, and if he doesn't call back, I don't question him about why he didn't. I act like an adult and patiently wait to be with my kids again and ask them.

So you only call him and NOT your kids?

 

[onebdzee]

:doublestandarddramaqueen:

she's trying to get the nomination early on in the year for the '06 award

 

[Chasey_Lane]

I act like an adult

 

[MDTerps]

Nobody's saying you shouldn't be able to do those things. Why not arrange a time for him to call? 15 minutes before bedtime or something that on a set schedule.

As I stated in my post last night, my child calls me at 730 on the nights he is with his dad, and he calls his dad at 730 on the nights he is with me.
I love hearing from my son each night he is with his dad, to catch up on things and see how his day went. Shows that a parent cares!
Why don't you talk with your ex and set something like this up with him? Have the kids call him that way you don't have to talk to him. If he wants to call hand the phone over to one of your children to answer, you don't have to be the one to answer the phone and hear a voice you say you don't like to hear.

 

[onebdzee]

So you only call him and NOT your kids?

 

[bresamil]

So you only call him and NOT your kids?

ding ding ding ding ding

 

[Nickel]

Is it possible that the reason he calls so frequently is because you don't answer the phone or allow the kids to call him back? Maybe if you let the kids talk to him once a day, he would call once a day. :shrug:

 

[sushisamba]

Why don't you talk with your ex and set something like this up with him? Have the kids call him that way you don't have to talk to him. If he wants to call hand the phone over to one of your children to answer, you don't have to be the one to answer the phone and hear a voice you say you don't like to hear.[/QUOTE]

Yeah, I think this is the best solution. Thanks.

 

[Pete]

You are right, you don't have to tell him what you are doing every minute. Have you tried talking to him calmly about it Set up a time to call? I can see where it is a PITA, ?but I also see you glancing at the phone and seeing him on caller ID and hitting silence and not calling him back is outwardly contemptuous.

As far as your statement about "sole" custody, do you mean Primary physical custody where you share decisions 50/50 but you have them the majority of the time and he gets weekends, or "sole" as in you have 100% veto/decision making power and he gets visitation IF you allow it?

**AAAAACHOOOOOO


Excuse me whew

 

[RoseRed]

**AAAAACHOOOOOO


Excuse me whew

She only reads what she wants to read. She still hasn't answered my question about the ages of her and her children.

 

[mAlice]

True. But it's mostly on my cell phone when we're going somewhere or are trying to get dinner and homework done. It's always at very inconvenient times.

I didn't read all of the responses, but this is what I suggest. If he is calling at inconvenient times, coordinate with him for a good time to speak to the children every evening. If you don't like him calling your cell phone, tell him to only use the house phone to speak to the children, that if he calls your cell phone you will assume it's to speak to you and that you may not answer, because it may not be convenient for you.

 

[sushisamba]

I am 35 and I have 6 yo twin boys. We separated when they were 2.

 

[Dougstermd]

I am 35 and I have 6 yo twin boys. We separated when they were 2.

I thought my ex was a stupid b!tch but now I am thinkin different

 

[sushisamba]

I am shocked at how judgmental everyone is being. All I wanted to know is if everyone ALWAYS answered their exes calls. I get sh!t from him when I don't and just needed a reality check. From what I've read on here, though, I need to be accessible to him forever because of the kids. That's cool.

 

[RoseRed]

I am 35 and I have 6 yo twin boys. We separated when they were 2.

Then you are old enough to know better. The boys are old enough to make and receive calls on their own with their father. You shouldn't have to be involved.

 

[Pete]

I am shocked at how judgmental everyone is being. All I wanted to know is if everyone ALWAYS answered their exes calls. I get sh!t from him when I don't and just needed a reality check. From what I've read on here, though, I need to be accessible to him forever because of the kids. That's cool.

I am shocked how many people use the "judgemental" excuse when they get an answer they don't like.

Everyone IS JUDGMENTAL!

 

[Toxick]

From what I've read on here, though, I need to be accessible to him forever because of the kids.

Then you are not reading correctly.