yakky doodle
New Member
Spud was/is a person on the forum. Like i said, no worries. she clarified it for me. 
Stepping Out
- Thread starter MDindef
- Start date
tater
New Member
Originally posted by yakky doodle
Spud was/is a person on the forum. Like i said, no worries. she clarified it for me.
Right, but Spud and potato are synonomous and you said earlier that the way she was talking about saltines made you think she was talking about Spud. Just didn't understand the correlation between spud and saltine.
Oh my.... my eyes have gone crossed
yakky doodle
New Member
Originally posted by kwillia
I do get that it is an inside joke so I will let this pass before I get a headache and ruin my husbands night!
THANK YOU!
K
Kain99
Guest
Spud will always love Bch - sorry taken.
K
Kain99
Guest
Originally posted by Biscuit
Here is the best way to ensure your partner doesn't cheat.
Or...... you could try being sweet FOR A CHANGE!
Cheaters Never Win
This is not to say that I don't enjoy the sights, but I have it too good at home to do anything to mess it up.
My husband and I are very comfortable (and open) with one another, so I don't think we'd ever get to the point where we'd cheat on one another. Plus, if I did, I would feel way too guilty...especially when thinking about what his response would be. I love him too much to do that to him.
By the way, I have a friend who has kissed another man "away from home." She says she enjoys the chase, but the guilt kills her. I'd hate to think how her life would change if her husband ever found out the truth!
This is not to say that I don't enjoy the sights, but I have it too good at home to do anything to mess it up.
My husband and I are very comfortable (and open) with one another, so I don't think we'd ever get to the point where we'd cheat on one another. Plus, if I did, I would feel way too guilty...especially when thinking about what his response would be. I love him too much to do that to him.
By the way, I have a friend who has kissed another man "away from home." She says she enjoys the chase, but the guilt kills her. I'd hate to think how her life would change if her husband ever found out the truth!
Biscuit
Livin' Large
Re: Cheaters Never Win
I would hate to see him waste more of his life with someone that obviously doesn't love him. I think it is more of a crime to stay with someone you don't love and steal what can never be replace... their time left in their life. I think it sucks for him, there is probably some out there that would trully love him.
I would hate to see him waste more of his life with someone that obviously doesn't love him. I think it is more of a crime to stay with someone you don't love and steal what can never be replace... their time left in their life. I think it sucks for him, there is probably some out there that would trully love him.
K
Kain99
Guest
Re: Cheaters Never Win
Well Olive Welcome.... You sure know how to stir Biscuit up! He's been ranting and Raving ever since your post.
Kinda glad..... (I think) I just learned something pretty interesting....
Biscuits philosophy is that if our marriage fails he'll know exactly why.... No doubt, no wondering for years....
It'll be because he is a complete tyrant.... His words (well sort of) Not mine....
Ya learn something new every day.....
Well Olive Welcome.... You sure know how to stir Biscuit up! He's been ranting and Raving ever since your post.
Kinda glad..... (I think) I just learned something pretty interesting....
Biscuits philosophy is that if our marriage fails he'll know exactly why.... No doubt, no wondering for years....
It'll be because he is a complete tyrant.... His words (well sort of) Not mine....
Ya learn something new every day.....
K
Kain99
Guest
Originally posted by Biscuit
OH, Make no mistake it will be all your fault
Ya know something.... I've always known that!
For 5 short minutes I thought I had something new to chew on but ya went and wiped that out in one fell swoop!
Thanks Pumpkin.......
K
Kizzy
Guest
Speaking of the "Chase" this is what I meant about my earlier comment. I work in an ALL MALE environment and I have chosen to get my degree in an ALL MALE field (I'm lucky if there is 3 woman in a class of 30 or 40 ), in my opinion, the "hot ones" are zeros beyond looks and lack a personable personality. Many (NOT ALL) of them do cheat, and as many of you know, I have been at this job since I was 18 years old and I have spent 15-16 years in this environment. Since, I am pretty blunt, I have asked WHY? I have heard the same thing, just because I am stepping out doesn't mean I am not taking care of business at home. 
They like the chase and the strange.
It makes going to work functions difficult at best, which I mentioned (I think to Sharon) that a recent party got a bit vulgar, and my hubby refuses to go to anymore of the parties because of the “following around and stepping out” that he knows goes on. A few of us at work have discussed the issue and all agree it isn’t a good environment to be around. It is one thing to joke around but it is another when you watch ignorant spouses stand there like veal and watch it, knowing what I do know, it makes it a hard pill to swallow. Like I have said it isn't all but many, but I can understand a comment Barbara made, I’d rather be friendless than have to make friends with some of these spouses with that issue on the back of my mind.
We do have "some" women in the work place that have in the past or currently do "fool around.” I just notice that it isn’t the “hot ones” they fool around with; it is the ones that offer them something to fill some emotional gap. Maybe this emotional gaps is one that consist of a non-sociable spouse, a spouse that shows no interest and lacks providing the attention the woman desires. I won’t judge the person, who does it, just don’t bring it around, so my comment about what I don’t know doesn’t hurt me. It is what I do know that bothers me. Also, when I said I would not imagine my hubby doing it, it is because this issue has been one in the fore front of our entire marriage, we have been to beautiful weddings that cost a fortune and a year later (if that), I come home and say well so-and-so’s marriage is over. It seems that each and every time, it is because one of them “stepped out” and got caught. That is when $hit hits the fan, and the one who did it ends up regretting what they did and how bad it hurt the other spouse. All the sudden the chase nor the strange was worth it and they are driving great distances to see the children that were left behind.
Now after 13 years of marriage, if my hubby mentions another woman, I say sure honey bring her home, maybe she can cook, clean, do laundry, run the vacuum, cut the grass, taxi the kids around and still have the energy to give you a cracker, saltine, $ex whatever. I could sure use some help around here.
Hopefully, I made sense this time.
They like the chase and the strange. It makes going to work functions difficult at best, which I mentioned (I think to Sharon) that a recent party got a bit vulgar, and my hubby refuses to go to anymore of the parties because of the “following around and stepping out” that he knows goes on. A few of us at work have discussed the issue and all agree it isn’t a good environment to be around. It is one thing to joke around but it is another when you watch ignorant spouses stand there like veal and watch it, knowing what I do know, it makes it a hard pill to swallow. Like I have said it isn't all but many, but I can understand a comment Barbara made, I’d rather be friendless than have to make friends with some of these spouses with that issue on the back of my mind.
We do have "some" women in the work place that have in the past or currently do "fool around.” I just notice that it isn’t the “hot ones” they fool around with; it is the ones that offer them something to fill some emotional gap. Maybe this emotional gaps is one that consist of a non-sociable spouse, a spouse that shows no interest and lacks providing the attention the woman desires. I won’t judge the person, who does it, just don’t bring it around, so my comment about what I don’t know doesn’t hurt me. It is what I do know that bothers me. Also, when I said I would not imagine my hubby doing it, it is because this issue has been one in the fore front of our entire marriage, we have been to beautiful weddings that cost a fortune and a year later (if that), I come home and say well so-and-so’s marriage is over. It seems that each and every time, it is because one of them “stepped out” and got caught. That is when $hit hits the fan, and the one who did it ends up regretting what they did and how bad it hurt the other spouse. All the sudden the chase nor the strange was worth it and they are driving great distances to see the children that were left behind.
Now after 13 years of marriage, if my hubby mentions another woman, I say sure honey bring her home, maybe she can cook, clean, do laundry, run the vacuum, cut the grass, taxi the kids around and still have the energy to give you a cracker, saltine, $ex whatever. I could sure use some help around here.
Hopefully, I made sense this time.
Last edited by a moderator:
Woo hoo! Only my second night on here and I've already stirred things up! 
But seriously, I think everyone has their moments of "temptation." I mean, we're all human. But it's what you decide to DO about that temptation that matters. I come home to my husband every night, who just happens to love me and make me laugh. Who could ask for more?
I don't really know what to say to my friend who feels otherwise. I actually thought she had the perfect life...cute kids, a good husband for over 10 years...when she told me, I was like
I don't know what advice to give her, except to be careful what she wished for. She said she would "never be serious" with this other guy, but I think kissing him is serious enough. I mean, just imagine the implications. My husband would be FURIOUS, and I would think he would never forgive (or at least never forget). You would immediately lose that special "bond" in your relationship, and I don't think that things would ever be the same.
Marriage is for better AND for worse. It's all about negotiation and compromise. If you can't work through your issues, don't make it worse by lying and cheating. Just get out and be done with it. Why prolong the inevitable?
But seriously, I think everyone has their moments of "temptation." I mean, we're all human. But it's what you decide to DO about that temptation that matters. I come home to my husband every night, who just happens to love me and make me laugh. Who could ask for more?
I don't really know what to say to my friend who feels otherwise. I actually thought she had the perfect life...cute kids, a good husband for over 10 years...when she told me, I was like
I don't know what advice to give her, except to be careful what she wished for. She said she would "never be serious" with this other guy, but I think kissing him is serious enough. I mean, just imagine the implications. My husband would be FURIOUS, and I would think he would never forgive (or at least never forget). You would immediately lose that special "bond" in your relationship, and I don't think that things would ever be the same.
Marriage is for better AND for worse. It's all about negotiation and compromise. If you can't work through your issues, don't make it worse by lying and cheating. Just get out and be done with it. Why prolong the inevitable?
K
Kizzy
Guest
Your friend is lacking something in her marriage. I don't even know her and can say that. She may have her priorities in line, yes, but there is something she isn't getting that this other man offers. My guess attention, that feeling of, hey, I'm still attractive and desired. We all want it and when you live with somebody year after year, sometimes we tend to treat him or her like furniture or we are treated like furniture.
I have a guy friend that I have been close to for years, not physically but emotionally, I have said to my hubby that he has filled an emotional void in my life. I would never mess around with him and ruin my relationship that the now 3 of us have. He is single and a great catch for anyone in the say 33-43 year bracket. Not everyone has somebody, so it is nice when you can be that friend to somebody. I have gotten some crap over the friendship, but I just relate better to men than women for the most part. Plus, he dated a friend of mine that well "stepped out" of the relationship. I thought my friend was a huge $hit for that, because he is really a great person. My hubby now goes fishing and sees hockey games with my friend.
I have a guy friend that I have been close to for years, not physically but emotionally, I have said to my hubby that he has filled an emotional void in my life. I would never mess around with him and ruin my relationship that the now 3 of us have. He is single and a great catch for anyone in the say 33-43 year bracket. Not everyone has somebody, so it is nice when you can be that friend to somebody. I have gotten some crap over the friendship, but I just relate better to men than women for the most part. Plus, he dated a friend of mine that well "stepped out" of the relationship. I thought my friend was a huge $hit for that, because he is really a great person. My hubby now goes fishing and sees hockey games with my friend.
Last edited by a moderator:
K
Kain99
Guest
IM4Change
I recall reading that professionals in your field have either the highest or second highest Divorce rate in the Nation.
I'm not defending the behavior but I think that there is more at work psychologically here than meets the eye.
The stress levels associated with that, must be enormous since both you and hubby work in this field. NO one can deny that there is really no tougher job on the planet than what the two of you do.
I know that at least your department is pretty good about providing assistance in coping with stress. What about your husbands?
You are a sweet girl! Be careful playing the "Best friend" game. Often times we as women have one thing in mind and end up shocked when we find out that our best friends had something else up their sleeve.
I know I joke with you alot regarding Pete but he's prime example of an Officer with extra curricular duties on his mind.
Not that I don't absolutely adore him... But I've watched him change.
Not everyone on the planet has a heart like yours......
I recall reading that professionals in your field have either the highest or second highest Divorce rate in the Nation.
I'm not defending the behavior but I think that there is more at work psychologically here than meets the eye.
The stress levels associated with that, must be enormous since both you and hubby work in this field. NO one can deny that there is really no tougher job on the planet than what the two of you do.
I know that at least your department is pretty good about providing assistance in coping with stress. What about your husbands?
You are a sweet girl! Be careful playing the "Best friend" game. Often times we as women have one thing in mind and end up shocked when we find out that our best friends had something else up their sleeve.
I know I joke with you alot regarding Pete but he's prime example of an Officer with extra curricular duties on his mind.
Not that I don't absolutely adore him... But I've watched him change.
Not everyone on the planet has a heart like yours......
K
Kain99
Guest
Here's a hint....
Bad Boys Bad Boys, Watcha Gonna Do?
Watcha Gonna Do when they come for you!
Bad Boys Bad Boys, Watcha Gonna Do?
Watcha Gonna Do when they come for you!
K
Kizzy
Guest
Kain,
I've learned the hard way on the "best friend" thing. When the girls start out as just a girl friend of one of the guys I work with, it is obvious that they want to get to know me better to keep him close. A long time ago, I made it a point to tell the guys I work with that in no way shape or form will I EVER set them up with anymore of my friends.
After all the years I have worked in this place, I slipped up one time. Just one time. This is what happened. The g/f called and I said oh he just left the building to get something to eat over at such and such restaurant. Well, come to find out he was already caught with a waitress at that place by the g/f, so she knew it wasn't the food at this place he went to pick up. Needless to say, $hit hit the fan. I am much much more guarded now, and my hubby is too since he got someone in trouble with his wife, pretty much the same type of story as mine.
Yes, in this profession, they have the highest divorce rate in the NATION.
I've learned the hard way on the "best friend" thing. When the girls start out as just a girl friend of one of the guys I work with, it is obvious that they want to get to know me better to keep him close. A long time ago, I made it a point to tell the guys I work with that in no way shape or form will I EVER set them up with anymore of my friends.
After all the years I have worked in this place, I slipped up one time. Just one time. This is what happened. The g/f called and I said oh he just left the building to get something to eat over at such and such restaurant. Well, come to find out he was already caught with a waitress at that place by the g/f, so she knew it wasn't the food at this place he went to pick up. Needless to say, $hit hit the fan. I am much much more guarded now, and my hubby is too since he got someone in trouble with his wife, pretty much the same type of story as mine.
Yes, in this profession, they have the highest divorce rate in the NATION.
Last edited by a moderator: