The Good Wife

[mainman]

In your world maybe Sister Mary Kneesclenched.

Can I laugh here without a pissin in the cereal joke?

 

[julz20684]

To quote Lewis Grizzard, world renowned author and great American "She tore out my heart and stomped that sucker flat" is a trauma many men remember for a long time. After the second time sometimes you come to the realization "It just aint worth it." At 42, after being dead broke, despondent, sleepless, ashamed, and in agony I sometimes like to sit in my metaphorical recliner and savor life. A life where I am comfortable, a life where no one is going to cause me trauma or drama, a life where I can come and go as I please, do what I please, buy what I please without argument, smirks, looks of disgust or retaliation.

I think it possibly is a phemonemon of guys our age. Most of us have been married once or twice before, long term girlfriends, pussy whipped, beat down or done wrong and now it is like "NO MORE"

Why do I have a mental pic of Sally Field in Norma Raye? :confused.

At 38, after being dead broke, abused, abandoned, sleepless, ashamed, broken hearted, mentally beat down, dragged through the mud, left feeling worthless I sometimes like to enjoy life because I finally realize what I wonderful person I am. I like this wonderful person to savor life in the companionship of a man who will treat me better than I treat myself. I also like to savor time to myself, as any normal person wants to but want to share my life with someone as well.

The mental pic of Sally Field in Norma Raye is the pic you have created for all women.

 

[cattitude]

Can I laugh here without a pissin in the cereal joke?

I just pissed but there was no cereal bowl.

 

[vraiblonde]

I think there's even casual sex in a marriage.

For real. One of those, "Hey, babykins, you know how sometimes you like to just bangbangbang in 5 minutes flat, and not have to work on it or talk or act all schmoopy? Well, tonight's your night!"

 

[julz20684]

The same can be said of alot of women too. They don't want to put any effort at all into a relationship, just coast along and leave when they find someone better.

You are absolutely right.

 

[cattitude]

At 38, after being dead broke, abused, abandoned, sleepless, ashamed, broken hearted, mentally beat down, dragged through the mud in courts, left feeling worthless I sometimes like to enjoy life because I finally realize what I wonderful person I am. I like this wonderful person to savor life in the companionship of a man who will treat me better than I treat myself. I also like to savor time to myself, as any normal person wants to but want to share my life with someone as well.

The mental pic of Sally Field in Norma Raye is the pic you have created for all women.

Okay..okay...you want to take Biscuit for the weekend?

 

[cattitude]

For real. One of those, "Hey, babykins, you know how sometimes you like to just bangbangbang in 5 minutes flat, and not have to work on it or talk or act all schmoopy? Well, tonight's your night!"

And please let my dogs back in on your way out.

 

[julz20684]

Okay..okay...you want to take Biscuit for the weekend?

Please

 

[vraiblonde]

I like this wonderful person to savor life in the companionship of a man who will treat me better than I treat myself.

I do not know a single guy who will treat me better than I treat myself. I have never even *heard* of such a thing. Oh, sure, they might spoil you up on occasion, but you will pay for it by putting up with their grumpy moods and general guyishness.

Which is not to say it's a bad deal, but don't be thinking it's all sunshine and roses. There's a definite trade-off, on both sides.

 

[cattitude]

Which is not to say it's a bad deal, but don't be thinking it's all sunshine and roses. There's a definite trade-off, on both sides.

Exactly. And the older you get the more you understand how it all works.

 

[Vince]

I do not know a single guy who will treat me better than I treat myself. I have never even *heard* of such a thing. Oh, sure, they might spoil you up on occasion, but you will pay for it by putting up with their grumpy moods and general guyishness.

Which is not to say it's a bad deal, but don't be thinking it's all sunshine and roses. There's a definite trade-off, on both sides.

Like it says, "for better or worse, richer or poorer." :shrug: Can't be good all the time, but you've got to be willing to get through the rough spots with someone.

 

[julz20684]

I do not know a single guy who will treat me better than I treat myself. I have never even *heard* of such a thing. Oh, sure, they might spoil you up on occasion, but you will pay for it by putting up with their grumpy moods and general guyishness.

Which is not to say it's a bad deal, but don't be thinking it's all sunshine and roses. There's a definite trade-off, on both sides.

It's a saying my Aunt always told me. I don't ever profess to think anything is sunshine and roses at all times. Life is hard, life spills into relationships. Life is not all sunshine and roses nor are relationships...life takes work, relationships take work

 

[kwillia]

Exactly. And the older you get the more you understand how it all works.

 

[CandyRain]

1. If I found some chick who was so much a match it was effortless, or 2. I got so fond of her it felt effortless then cool.

#1 is not realistic but #2 is the way it's supposed to be when you love someone.

When you love someone, it's not "work". It's kinda like owning your own business, even when you work 24 hours a day, you don't look at it as "work". Working 9-5 for someone else though feels like work and then some.

 

[kwillia]

#1 is not realistic but #2 is the way it's supposed to be when you love someone.

When you love someone, it's not "work". It's kinda like owning your own business, even when you work 24 hours a day, you don't look at it as "work". Working 9-5 for someone else though feels like work and then some.

I disagree with your wording because there are definately times in every long term relationship where "love" ain't in the house. That's when the real work keeps the relationship going over that hump.

 

[cattitude]

I disagree with your wording because there are definately times in every long term relationship where "love" ain't in the house. That's when the real work keeps the relationship going over that hump.

Sometimes they don't even breathe right.

 

[kwillia]

Sometimes they don't even breathe right.

I really believe more marriages would last if more folks would realize it takes less work and effort to keep what they have going than it does to find someone and try to start all over with again. Especially if they didn't learn the first time around and still don't figure out how to get over the humps in the next relationship.

 

[CandyRain]

I disagree with your wording because there are definately times in every long term relationship where "love" ain't in the house. That's when the real work keeps the relationship going over that hump.

"Love" is always there, sometimes it's just overshadowed by disappointments, hurt, anger, etc.

 

[kwillia]

"Love" is always there, sometimes it's just overshadowed by disappointments, hurt, anger, etc.

I'll betcha lots of relationships could have survived long term if and when one or the other "lost that loving feeling" had actually realized that falling out of love is normal and waited it out to re-fall again.

 

[CandyRain]

I'll betcha lots of relationships could have survived long term if and when one or the other "lost that loving feeling" had actually realized that falling out of love is normal and waited it out to re-fall again.

Well, now you're talking "in" love. That's a completely different concept. Like I said, "love" is always there. "In" love is that deliriously giddy, romantic, butterflies-in-stomach thing that, yes, comes and goes.