Teen Pregnancy Prevention in St Marys

[crabcake]

Originally posted by kwillia
... That is just one example...

Honestly, I'd tell my daughter if she wanted to dress like a hoochie-mama to be prepared to be the topic of much unpleasant discussion in the boys' locker room and that she can rapidly anticipate being taken advantage of. I don't anticipate having any problem telling her (when she gets to that age) that wearing "hoochie" clothes is trampy and I am not running a brothel.

I'm a hardarse though. I seek out examples to show my kid. If I see a streetwalking hoochie, I'll show it to my daughter, and say "there's an example of someone who doesn't pride themselves enough on who they are as much as what they appear to want to give out."

Hearing a 5-year-old say, "Mommy, what's a hoochie?" is priceless though.

 

[crabcake]

Re: Another thing...

Originally posted by kwillia
One of the girls in his CCD class had on a low cut spegetti-strapped tank top. She is a really cute blue-eyed, blonde headed, giggly girl with cleavage at the tender age of 10.... she was blatantly flirtty with the guys in the class. Just think of how many hootchie-mamettes-to-be he is exposed to daily...

I'd casually ask the hooch-ette's parent's how much they farm her out for by the hour; that your boy is interested. Bet she doesn't come back wearing the spaghetti-strapped tank with her chest popping out.

 

[SxyPrincess]

Here's 2 scenarios for you...

My Mom was pretty open with me and let me be my own person, have friends over, go out later than most kids, etc. I respected her for respecting my decisions. Because of that, she always knew where I was, and who I was with. I was 15, going to clubs and she knew. Maybe that's bad parenting...:shrug:

I lived with my Dad for 2 years from 15-17. He was very strict and I always felt the need to lie about where I had been, or where I was going. If I had been in an accident, he'd never have known where I was.

 

[cattitude]

KW, I agree and, you know, I've found the girls to be the aggressive ones. One of my sons told me about a girl begging him for sex and he just didn't think he was ready....I believe they were about 15 or so at the time. Some of the "notes" I've seen from girls would absolutely amaze you!!

 

[SxyPrincess]

Originally posted by cattitude
One of my sons told me about a girl begging him for sex and he just didn't think he was ready....

I like to beg now, but only when I play the 'who can give in first' game.

 

[justhangn]

Originally posted by cattitude
KW, I agree and, you know, I've found the girls to be the aggressive ones. One of my sons told me about a girl begging him for sex and he just didn't think he was ready....I believe they were about 15 or so at the time. Some of the "notes" I've seen from girls would absolutely amaze you!!

That's the story he told his mother.

 

[vraiblonde]

Originally posted by crabcake
I'd casually ask the hooch-ette's parent's how much they farm her out for by the hour; that your boy is interested. Bet she doesn't come back wearing the spaghetti-strapped tank with her chest popping out.

People with young children live in a dream world. Do you think the Mom didn't see what the child was wearing when she went out of the house? If she cared, wouldn't she have said something?

Larry is golfing buddies with the father of a 13 year old that lives down the street from us. Good looking girl with long legs and skimpy clothing. The Dad remarked to Larry that, when she's old enough (16 to serve), he's going to send her to work at the golf club - "With her looks and body, can you imagine the tips she'd get?"

Now. The very last thing we'd want for our daughters is to send them to work at a place where older male pervs will be gawking at their bodies and making suggestive remarks to them (which is what they do). But this Dad was all for trotting his daughter out so she could make a couple of bucks. What lesson does that teach our daughters?

 

[SxyPrincess]

Originally posted by kwillia
I plan to avoid both extremes.

You plan to, but if it will actually work, you don't know. Honestly, what's the median? How can you rest assured your children will be perfect little angels? You can't...

 

[cattitude]

Originally posted by SxyPrincess
Here's 2 scenarios for you...

My Mom was pretty open with me and let me be my own person, have friends over, go out later than most kids, etc. I respected her for respecting my decisions. Because of that, she always knew where I was, and who I was with. I was 15, going to clubs and she knew. Maybe that's bad parenting...:shrug:

I lived with my Dad for 2 years from 15-17. He was very strict and I always felt the need to lie about where I had been, or where I was going. If I had been in an accident, he'd never have known where I was.

Like I said Sxy, it's a crap shoot. I've always been like your mom. My daughter was pretty open with me (well, she's my step..but she told me all the "dirt" and didn't tell her mom). My youngest tells me most everything. We have a great relationship but he still makes some stupid decisions.

I really think it comes down to not sending mixed messages, being firm but understanding...knowing they're gonna screw up at times. What works for one kid in one family, doesn't work for the next.

 

[Bertha Venation]

Originally posted by SxyPrincess
Here's 2 scenarios for you...

My Mom was pretty open with me and let me be my own person, have friends over, go out later than most kids, etc. I respected her for respecting my decisions. Because of that, she always knew where I was, and who I was with. I was 15, going to clubs and she knew. Maybe that's bad parenting...:shrug:

I lived with my Dad for 2 years from 15-17. He was very strict and I always felt the need to lie about where I had been, or where I was going. If I had been in an accident, he'd never have known where I was.

It'll be interesting to see how it goes with my sister and her daughter, who's almost 16. I think she'll do much what your mom did, but the girl's not much into clubbing.... (Strangely, my sister had to "club" the girl to get her to the DMV for her learner's permit. I think that "I don't wanna drive" attitude will last about ten seconds once she's behind the wheel.)

 

[SxyPrincess]

Originally posted by vraiblonde
What lesson does that teach our daughters?

You can get any man to do anything for you at any time?

 

[crabcake]

Originally posted by kwillia
I plan to avoid both extremes.

I think you can properly raise kids and let them earn the ability to make sound judgements based on their actions. If they screw up, they pay the price; if they can demonstrate sound judgement and decision making, they can have added responsibility once they demonstrate the ability to handle what they have.

I don't think I'd let my 15 year old go to a club though. I may be a bit of a hardarse, but think that's just too young and in this day/age, there is too much potential for trouble.

 

[SxyPrincess]

Originally posted by cattitude
Like I said Sxy, it's a crap shoot. I've always been like your mom. My daughter was pretty open with me (well, she's my step..but she told me all the "dirt" and didn't tell her mom). My youngest tells me most everything. We have a great relationship but he still makes some stupid decisions.

If you tell your children not to do something, they're going to do it. They will touch a hot stove. They will try and put a finger in the outlet. If you, as a parent have taught them both right/wrong and given examples of each scenario, hopefully they'll choose right.

 

[justhangn]

Originally posted by vraiblonde
What lesson does that teach our daughters?

He's planning on pimping his daughter, plain and simple.

 

[crabcake]

Originally posted by vraiblonde
Do you think the Mom didn't see what the child was wearing when she went out of the house? If she cared, wouldn't she have said something?

my guess is the mom (dressing her daughter like that) was probably not far from the same, herself. letting a little girl go out like that is indicative of a sound lack of parental judgement. JMHO.

The golfing buddy sounds like Larry from Three's company ... a freaking perv!

 

[SxyPrincess]

Originally posted by crabcake
my guess is the mom (dressing her daughter like that) was probably not far from the same, herself. letting a little girl go out like that is indicative of a sound lack of parental judgement. JMHO.

Or the girl went to a friends house to change?

 

[Bertha Venation]

Re: Another thing...

Originally posted by kwillia
One of the girls in his CCD class had on a low cut spegetti-strapped tank top. She is a really cute blue-eyed, blonde headed, giggly girl with cleavage at the tender age of 10.... she was blatantly flirtty with the guys in the class.

That is so freakin' sad.

 

[cattitude]

Originally posted by SxyPrincess
If you, as a parent have taught them both right/wrong and given examples of each scenario, hopefully they'll choose right.

Yep. I think all kids go astray at one time or another. Testing their wings, if you will. But when they get their minds right, most come back to what they know, the way they were raised. I see this with my older children and it's amazing and quite gratifying.

 

[crabcake]

Originally posted by cattitude
Like I said Sxy, it's a crap shoot. I've always been like your mom. My daughter was pretty open with me (well, she's my step..but she told me all the "dirt" and didn't tell her mom). My youngest tells me most everything. We have a great relationship but he still makes some stupid decisions.

I really think it comes down to not sending mixed messages, being firm but understanding...knowing they're gonna screw up at times. What works for one kid in one family, doesn't work for the next.

I think you hit the nail on the head there Catt. Keeping open lines of communication with your kids so they feel like they can talk to you about things is critical, IMO. Even this early on, I try to instill as much pride and self esteem in my daughter as possible, but come them teen years (we know how teens/boys can be), I know she'll have some low points and need reassurance. It's then I hope she comes to me instead of seeking sexual reassurance from some horn-dog senior in school.

 

[crabcake]

Originally posted by SxyPrincess
Or the girl went to a friends house to change?

kwill said parents had to be there the first night. I assume she was there with them.