You Were All Such Great Help Before. . .

[vegmom]

There have been many affairs - I just have not approached him about all of them - I did not find out about them in the most honest way.

I actually set him up this weekend - I created a fake profile and he hit on me, invited me out for coffee. I sent a friend to the restaurant. . . . .he showed up and stayed even though my friend was there. After he got 'stood up' he went home and sent me, 'er' my fake me, an e-mail, really upset that I didn't show up!

I wouldn't play games like that. If he's meeting women online and having affairs then your lawyer can supoena records. What people who cheat forget is that internet chat records and profiles are FOREVER- saved on the servers of various archiving agencies for spouses and future employers to find.

 

[PrepH4U]

You should have went...

That or said gee I have a real strong urge for some good coffee wanna go out and get some with me!

 

[JPC sr]

Batman

I am trying to hit on all the questions/comments left. . .

I am pretty sure he wouldn't physically harm me and positive he wouldn't physically harm our daughter. I think he loves her - just doesn't know how to be a father to her so that keeps him from interacting with her, playing with her, etc. He lives with his parents right now - his father is a raging alcoholic, a binge drinker who has some days when he can't even get out of bed, I never know when he'll be on a drunk; his sister is an addict/alcoholic and constantly in and out of rehab, when she's out she's there; he is an alcoholic with one year sobriety, but has stopped attending his AA meetings some time ago. His mother doesn't claim herself as alcoholic but likes her brandy in the evenings.

I've been told that I can't get a restraining order unless he physically harms me. . . .

You two could try getting some place of your own like maybe subsidized housing is around.

You need your man and he needs you and the child needs you both.

It is horribly hard to make a relationship work from two different houses.

The divorce can not help your family in any way as you are already separated.

Seriously, try a Priest or Minister and some of them will get you a place to live and real help with the baby from caring and experienced people.

Plus you do not have to be a part of any religion and tell them the hard truth.

The Lexington Park Pentecostal Church is a great place with fantastic people, link HERE.

Talk to Pastor Staten or his wife if you prefer or anyone there and the office is open every day.

Call there 301.862.9805 and they will get you and your husband a place if you tell them the need.

And the Catholic Churches are great help too, the Seventh Day Adventist, any Chuch anywhere as they all want to help and I promise they will all respect you and your family needs.

 

[PrepH4U]

You two could try getting some place of your own like maybe subsidized housing is around.

You need your man and he needs you and the child needs you both.

It is horribly hard to make a relationship work from two different houses.

The divorce can not help your family in any way as you are already separated.

Seriously, try a Priest or Minister and some of them will get you a place to live and real help with the baby from caring and experienced people.

Plus you do not have to be a part of any religion and tell them the hard truth.

The Lexington Park Pentecostal Church is a great place with fantastic people, link HERE.

Talk to Pastor Staten or his wife if you prefer or anyone there and the office is open every day.

Call there 301.862.9805 and they will get you and your husband a place if you tell them the need.

And the Catholic Churches are great help too, the Seventh Day Adventist, any Chuch anywhere as they all want to help and I promise they will all respect you and your family needs.

How did that work for you?

 

[RoseRed]

You should have went...

She should have asked him if he liked Pina Coladas.

 

[mainman]

She should have asked him if he liked Pina Coladas.

Or gettin caught in the rain?

 

[JPC sr]

Batman

There have been many affairs - I just have not approached him about all of them - I did not find out about them in the most honest way.

Even if true, all affairs are vain and fleeting.

You are the mother of his child and he has to answer to you if you play your hand.

I actually set him up this weekend - I created a fake profile and he hit on me, invited me out for coffee. I sent a friend to the restaurant. . . . .he showed up and stayed even though my friend was there. After he got 'stood up' he went home and sent me, 'er' my fake me, an e-mail, really upset that I didn't show up!

It is very likely that he knew it was you and expected you to show up.

Women always play games and men follow along.

You broke the rules by believing your own deception and not going through with it.

 

[RoseRed]

Or gettin caught in the rain?

Making love at midnight?

 

[mainman]

Making love at midnight?

In the dunes on the Cape?

 

[Vince]

It is amazing to me how you can twist every little thing you see to be the woman's fault. I am endlessly amazed by you. Just when I think you can't possibly be anymore off your rocker - you prove me wrong.

It's all your fault for paying attention to the idiot (JPC) to begin with. Push the ignore button. Do not answer, post, reply, or acknowledge the exsistence of JPC.

 

[Midnightrider]

Making love at midnight?

someone called?, oh that was @ not w/

 

[Geek]

I feel sorry for the kid. It looks like both parents a missing a few tampons from the box

 

[HappyCats]

She didn't use that in the context of fearing he will do harm to her or her child. She fears he may want to take the kid because she knows that is the one thing he can do that would hurt her... emotional hurt. But if I'm not mistaken, she can't just assume he is going to do this and keep the kid from him based on her "fear" that he might unless she can show probable cause. You have to be careful with the advice you throw out there. You wouldn't want to be responsible for her getting on the bad side of a judge.

She might anyway, just by posting all this stuff on here! My friend had all her myspace, message board postings and stuff like that brought up in court by her husband. There wasn't anything on there, but she told me, becareful what you post and who knows about it. Just a thought.

 

[aps45819]

Why are you giving ANYBODY relationship/marriage advice?

Why don't you start a thread on something you have had success at, like how to suck on the public teat instead of being a contributing member of society

 

[RoseRed]

In the dunes on the Cape?

If you're not into yoga, if you have half-a-brain...

 

[mainman]

If you're not into yoga, if you have half-a-brain...

Write to me and escape

 

[Pete]

I understand about people making stuff up. My father's ex put him thru the ringer. Unfortunatly the newspapers are filled with stories of women who were not taken seriously. That is kind of why we have such sweeping overreactions in the other direction.

No they are not, they are rare and when they do happen they are sensationalized and actually much different situations than what has been described here.

I get so tired of the bullchit, "I have lived with this man for XX years and now we are breaking up and I am terrified he is going to do something dastardly" stories, and the posturing to take away or inhibit him from his child like all of a sudden he is a danger and/or not worthy/capable.

You all need to grow the hell up and face facts. You are separating for whatever reason. It is his child JUST AS MUCH as it is yours. People do not turn into Jeffery Dahlmer all of a sudden one Tuesday afternoon. If he already beats your ass regularly or occasionally by all means go and get an order, if he doesn't or hasn't or even hinted he intends to beat your ass or kidnap your kid be an adult and work it out. Simply because you are at odds does not mean he is going to kidnap the kid or harm you.

 

[AiryT]

I really do not blame things on the women and I firmly believe it is ultimately the man's place and never the woman's.

But the man is not posting for me to tell him like it is.

Therefore I tell this poster what she can do to fix the problem, or at least to simmer it down.

When the woman trys to have such power over the man which she does not have then the family will be ruined.

It is a hard truth but marriage is not easy and the couple has to sacrifice to make it work.

You are a fruit cake..

 

[RoseRed]

Write to me and escape

 

[IrishGal]

Thanks for the ear-worm guys... now I've got that song stuck in my head. And before you ask, yeah the echo from all the other empty space is a wee bit irritating.

Now I gotta find SOMETHING else to sing to get rid of it...